If Only Time Stood Still
by TheFallenxLullaby
Summary: Everyone has secrets. Shirley knows this for a fact, but she has this compelling attraction to the aloof Lelouch and the new boy Suzaku. Little does she know, she's about to get sucked up in their darkness.
1. Enter Suzaku!

**A/N**: Hello everyone ~ I recently got inspired by an old article about ShirLulu in NewType about how Shirley's warm heart can surely melt Lelouch's hatred and her pure tears can cleanse his bloodstained hands. This fic will be in an alternative world.

**Pairings**: Shirley/Lelouch Shirley/Suzaku Rated T+ From Shirley's POV

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Code Geass or anything within it

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><p>One late morning, I have been doodling on the corner of my test paper for the past 5 minutes. We were having a history test and I flew by it with ease. From the corner of my eye I can see Lelou and he's gazing outside the window, deep in thought. Honestly, he's got brains, he has a lot of potential but he wastes it and it makes me so frustrated.<p>

"Miss Fenette?" I must have made a sound of exasperation because our teacher, Mrs. Hart, is looking directly at me. I apologized quickly and hid my face behind my hands as snickers from my classmates can be heard. The rest of the class couldn't have gone by quickly enough. As soon as the bell rang for lunch I grabbed my bag and walked to Lelou's and Rivalz table.

"What was up with you during the test, Shirley?" Rivalz asked straightaway. Lelou snapped his attention to me and the corners of his mouth were hinting at a smile.

"Just thinking of different ways for you two to stop skipping to gamble," I replied with my own hint of a smile. We walked out to the courtyard talking about the test and comparing answers we marked down. Rivalz, poor Rivalz, went on panic mode because his answers didn't match up with Lelou's or mines. The rest of the day went by.

During the Student Council meeting after school, Milly was fired up as usual. She told us about a transfer student arriving tomorrow who was an Eleven. I could of sworn she snuck a glance at Lelou while she was announcing that, which made my stomach feel weird. Lelou and I aren't exactly that close, we get along enough due to the fact that we're both on the Student Council and in the same classes. My nickname for him is my attempt to "get closer to him", if you get my meaning. And no, I don't like him that way. He's cold and aloof, but he lets his guard down around us in the Student Council. His fake, guarded smile seem more...well, genuine.

"An Eleven?" That was Rivalz. I didn't notice I was transfixed at Lelou until his eyes met mine. I averted my eyes and pretended I was interested on my pen. All the while, I can feel my cheeks grow hot. I furrowed by brows and put so much effort on being interested that I only heard Milly's response in broken sentences. All I caught was "Britannian Soldier", "1st year", "Few years back" and something about no differences. The conversation topic changed when Nina, a quiet, smart girl in our year reminded us about how the camping trip was coming up. For the next two hours we came up with a list on belongings needed and activities during the trip.

"Meeting adjourned," Milly exclaimed with a smile. I couldn't help but smile back at her enthusiasm. I grabbed my bag to go but Lelou stood in my way with a neutral look in his eyes and asked ever so politely if he can talk to me. Without anything else, he strode outside. I stared after him, and it was only Milly that brought me back to my senses by giving me a determined push. I fidgeted at the keychain on my bag as I followed his way outside. I felt nervous as to why he needed to talk to me, can it be because he caught me looking at him? I mean, I don't mean anything by it! I found him leaning against the wall. He turned and looked at me with the same neutral gaze.

"Shirley," He started with a bored voice. "I would appreciate it if you would stop staring at me." Just like that, straight to the point. I stood there dumbfounded. Sure, I kind of expected that, but I never expected him to be this curt. I recovered and narrowed my eyes slightly.

"Well, I'm sorry, never knew it was a crime, Lelouch," I put more edge in my voice when I said his name, no longer denying my so called crime. Okay, I guess I'm being a little childish now. But, I guess Lelouch suits him better than Lelou, even though I've grown quite accustomed to calling him Lelou. It seems he knew what I was thinking because his pokerface dropped and he grinned. I know he saw the surprised look on my face because his grin grew bigger and he gave a little chuckle.

"I didn't mean to offend you," He said a little more gentler. And with that, he left. And me? I just stood there trying to register my thoughts. Okay, I do not understand him at all. For some reason, maybe that's exactly why I feel this compelling need to understand him.

Later that night in bed, I was thinking about Lelouch. I've only known him for about 3 months since school started. I could still remember the first time I saw him...

It was the Entrance Ceremony of Ashford Academy. All the 1st years were gathered in the gymnasium waiting for the principal to give a speech. Everyone else was either, avoiding people's stares, making small talk to the person next to them, or like me looking around like as if it's so interesting we're finally in high school. But not Lelouch. I didn't know his name back then, I only saw this tall dark haired boy. He stood up straight and looked directly to the front. His eyes...were a beautiful amethyst color. The aura around him, I can sense, were more adult like and the whole 'don't approach me' attached to it. His eyes shifted slightly and met mine. I didn't look away. I couldn't, not yet. The principal's voice boomed through the speakers and broke our gazes. He looked away as if nothing happened and I turned my back to him. And that was certainly made an impression back then, but I refused to believe it. I decided to let that issue go and fell asleep.

The next morning, I saw a boy sitting on the seat next to mine. I've been neighborless for about 3 weeks now, because this girl transferred classes. I sat down and opened a book. I can feel stares at the back of my head and hear hushed whispers. Then I realized, they weren't directed at me. They were directed at the boy next to me. I turned my face slightly towards him and I knew immediately what they were making a fuss about. This boy was Japanese, an Eleven. He also had a book in front of him, clearly ignoring all the glances he's getting. Was this the boy Milly told us yesterday? The boy looked at me. Seriously, I need to learn to be discrete with my stares more...A small smile formed on my mouth. This boy had nice green eyes, kinda like mine but darker. He had nice enough features to be called handsome. He mirrored my smile. He seemed nice, so I held out my hand and introduced myself. He got shy all of a sudden but shook my hand and told me his name. Suzaku Kururugi. This little exchanged brought even more whispers, but I ignored it, and I returned to my book and he to his. Soon enough, the teacher came in and she introduced Suzaku. We didn't talk anymore after that. When the bell rang for lunch later, I turned to him and asked him if he wanted company during lunch. He looked down for a second and nodded. Behind him, Lelouch walked towards us. His pokerface on again. Suzaku turned towards him so I couldn't see his expression but I sure saw Lelouch's. Lelouch smiled and they both did that slap shake guys do. I threw a look at Rivalz but he just shrugged. We soon found enough, they were both old friends, which was what I wasn't expecting. But I realized something about Lelouch. He seemed less aware of his surroundings when he's talking to Suzaku. As if he didn't need to put up a guard. And once either he and Suzaku turned away from each other, he's back to his guarded expression. When I was on my way to the pool area, I saw Lelouch through the windows on the sides of the hallways. He was carrying a duffel bag which seemed to contain quite a lot of things, it looked like. He made a beeline towards entrance to exit the school. I stood there following him with my eyes till he was out of sight. A few seconds later, Suzaku appeared and went for the same direction Lelouch did. Out of the school. I tried to ignore the suspicions arising at the back of my mind. I mean it's normal for them to leave right? What bothered me was the look on Lelouch's face. It was cold, terrifying. Suzaku's was more...panicked. Without any hesitation, I broke into a run past the pool entrance. I needed to follow them, a fear crept at the back of my neck telling me something was wrong and I knew that.

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><p><strong>Continued in Chapter 2<strong>


	2. Suspicion

I ran straight towards to the corridors of the Academy only to be stopped by Milly.

"Shirley? Where's the fire?"

"Sorry, Madame Prez, I'm kind of in a hurry," I replied absently as I tried to go past her. She placed a hand on my arm and it was only then I looked directly at her face. She had a concerned expression so I had to guess my face revealed what I was thinking. It's one of the things I didn't like about myself, I was never good at hiding my true feelings like Lelouch can with his stoic expression.

"What's the matter?" I merely shook my head.

"Nothing, I guess, I suppose I'm just overreacting," I replied coming to a conclusion that I was overreacting of my suspicions. Milly simply looked at me and nodded not pushing any further. I bid her goodbye and headed back to the pool area. Somehow, I hope Lelouch and Suzaku's alright.

The next day during class, curious, I snuck a glance at Lelouch. Instead of gazing out the window, he was focused on the book in front of him. His long eyelashes barely hid his downcast purple eyes. He looked bored, but yet at the same time, at peace. I smiled, despite myself, knowing he didn't seem any different. Suzaku shifted on my left and it broke my focus on Lelouch.

"Smiling to yourself, Shirley?" He asked in a whisper, keeping his eyes on the board in the front of the class.

"It's a good day," I whispered back.

During lunch, we met at the usual spot at the courtyard. We waited for Milly, because we were informed she had something to announce to us. I stared up at the sky, shielding my eyes. It was a normal summer's day in late June.

"So, everyone, we'll be having a Welcoming Party for Suzaku, naturally," Milly beamed as soon as she arrived.

"Wow, well, I'm grateful, but I won't be here tonight," Suzaku answered with an apologetic smile. I saw Lelouch look at him, his expression hardened only for a split second, which took me by surprise.

"Sorry, Milly, I won't be either," Lelouch smiled at her. Milly's smile turned into a pout.

"Well, that's no fun, that's alright, some other time then," Milly shrugged off. We chatted about irrelevant things for the rest of the lunch period. But my mind was on other things, I was wrong. Things seemed different. But only between Lelouch and Suzaku. It's normal to have little spats with friends, right? I may be over thinking this a bit.

After the swim practice, I headed towards the clubhouse, thinking no one was there. But, when I entered I saw Lelouch sitting down with his laptop on the table. He looked up in surprise and gave me a polite smile.

"Hey Shirley, done with practice?" he asked casually. I returned his smile and nodded.

"And you? I thought you were busy."

"Well, it turns out that my schedule suddenly became clear." He returned his focus on his laptop. I walked towards him and took the seat across from him and pulled out my homework.

"Schedule, huh? Either you gamble at night now or you got yourself a girlfriend," I teased.

"Something like that," he replied, while he looked at me over his laptop.

"Figures, you are quite the ladies man."

"Is that what I'm referred to as of late?"

"As of late? If you haven't noticed, the girls in class fawn over you," I stated with a raised eyebrow. Surely, he's noticed. From day one, he attracted attention by his looks alone.

"To be honest, those things don't interest me," he replied indifferently, not missing a beat.

"Afraid of girls?" I asked. He looked at me in surprise.

"Of course not, none of the girls here captures my interest, that's all," he retorted back. I bit my lip, I don't know why but that kind of hurt. He must have realized that too because his expression softened.

"I didn't mean it like that, I just meant I just don't have time for those kind of things," he said a little more gently. Lelouch really is a kind guy deep down, otherwise he wouldn't be trying to apologize. I smiled weakly at him and we sat in silence for the next 10 minutes while I try to concentrate on my homework. I heard his chair scrape back as he gathered his belongings.

"I have to leave now, will you be alright by yourself here?"

"I'll be fine, thanks for worrying." He nodded and left. I finished up the rest of my homework and by the time I was done the sun was already down. I got up and looked outside the window. Stars were scattered across the dark velvet sky. I can't wait to go camping, it'd be nice to relax for a change.

That night, I slept early. As soon as I finished my shower I fell asleep immediately on top of my bed with my hair wet. Might be the cause because I had a very unusual dream. Lelouch was there, he was sitting down in the ground with his face buried between his knees. He was sobbing, rocking back and forth. I reached my hand towards him and when he turned his face to me. Everything about him blurred out. Then I suddenly woke up. I was sweating, my heart beating fast. I looked at the clock; 4:47am. I don't think I'll be able to get another hours sleep so I got up and showered. I stood there letting the jets of water hit my body. It was comforting. When I got out, I dressed and went outside to the courtyard. The sun barely peeking over the horizon.

"Shirley?" I turned around at the call of my name and there stood Suzaku with a backpack. I walked towards him, surprised to see him.

"Morning," I greeted. He smiled as he led us to a bench and we sat down.

"It's not even 6, why are you out here all by yourself?"

"Woke up pretty early and couldn't fall back asleep." That was half the truth. In reality, I was pretty spooked about my dream, and scared of going back to sleep. Just thinking about it is giving me chills.

"I see, I'm guessing you have a lot on your mind," I stared at him in surprise. "I catch you deep in thought more than once, you know."

"So, you watch me?" I teased. I don't how I had the courage to even say that to him, but upon hearing my words, Suzaku's cheeks flushed.

"W-well, um.." Suzaku stumbled over his words. I had the sudden urge to pinch his cheeks and I, then, was the one to blush. In the end, we both burst out laughing. Suzaku's presence was comforting. We talk to each other as if it was the most natural thing.

"Suzaku, where were you?" I finally asked him, eyeing his backpack. He shifted his backpack out of sight on the floor and leaned back.

"Hmm, it's better if you don't know," he said with a bit of annoyance. Something I caught. It seems as if Lelouch wasn't the only one with secrets, but the again who doesn't?

"And if I find out, will you have to kill me?" I asked easily, unfazed. He snapped his attention to me with fear in his eyes.

"Shirley, please don't say things like that," Did I just hear desperation in his voice? He looked frightened. I looked at his eyes. It was clouded with fear...and something else I couldn't figure out. He looked vulnerable all of a sudden. The sentence I said as a joke, got him like this? Without any hesitation, my hand moved to place it on top of his. I tightened my grip, and he relaxed, not flinching from the contact.

"Suzaku...it's okay, I was kidding around, I'm sorry..but don't worry, I won't be going anywhere," I said with intensity. As soon as I said that, a chill ran throughout my body and it transferred to his.


	3. The Dream

**A/N**: A few important notes, please read. In the article I mentioned in Chapter 1, it had something to do with Lelouch and Shirley that Sunrise made back then. It was titled "My Honest Feelings For You". It said that 'Shirley, who shines brightly like a sunny place to Lelouch and Suzaku. As if there is no such thing as evil in the world. She does not have much of a connection to Lelouch and Suzaku s grand plans and battles. Because she is 'love' to those participating in these important events.' Here is Chapter 3!

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><p>The chill that ran throughout our bodies after I made that promise was unsettling. The wind picked up all of a sudden and all we heard was the rustling of the summer leaves. But even then, I didn't remove my hand on top of his, nor did he try to free his.<p>

"I'm sorry for acting like that all of a sudden," Suzaku apologized avoiding my eyes.

"it's fine, I was just a bit worried," I said. I removed my hand and we both headed to the clubhouse in silence. When we arrived it was half past 6am and classes didn't start for more than an hour, so I brewed us some coffee. While I was pouring a cup for Suzaku and myself, Lelouch arrived. He greeted us good morning as he dropped his books on the counter.

"Good morning, would you like a cup, Lelouch?" I asked as I stirred in my creamer. Lelouch nodded and took a seat besides Suzaku. As I walked away from them to the sink for a cup I heard both of them discuss the camping trip. I guess they're back to normal now, or was I just jumping to conclusions like I thought? As I poured a cup for Lelouch, I snuck a look at him. His raven hair seemed damp, so he probably just finished a shower. As I placed his cup in front of him, his arm brushed mine. He smelled like shampoo and soap and generally pleasant. He glanced up and smiled at me.

"Thank you."

"Y-your welcome," I replied in a hurry and walking to take a seat across from them. I pulled out a magazine I borrowed from Sophie, my roommate, and flipped through it. The two boys were quiet now. Suzaku, absorbed in his own thoughts, drinking coffee. Lelouch, reading a book. Images from my dream flashed in my mind. Vivid pictures of Lelouch rocking back and forth and finally him turning to me, with his whole image being blurred out.

"Shirley?" Lelouch's panicked voice broke me free. I looked up and saw Suzaku standing staring at me with a concerned expression while Lelouch was sitting down with the same expression. I realized my hands were balled into a fist. I must of been hallucinating. I took a deep breathe. One, two.

"I'm sorry, I got absorbed in this magazine," I laughed weakly. Lelouch's eyes went to the page of the magazine I was on so I quickly closed it and put it back in my bag. There was an awkward silence until Milly burst in greeting us good morning followed by Nina.

"So who's ready for the camping trip?" Milly asked, excitement in her voice. Only the Prez would be able to have this much energy so early in the morning.

"I hope I can make it," Lelouch replied.

"Same here, it'd be nice," Suzaku said.

"I can't wait, Madame Prez," I smiled.

"That's the spirit, Shirley! As for you two.." Milly began eyeing Lelouch and Suzaku. "I'll be really mad if you miss this!"

Later that day during lunch, it was only Rivalz and myself. Milly and Nina were busy with some other paperwork and who knows where Lelouch and Suzaku were up to other than Rivalz. I stared intently at him and he shifted uncomfortably in his seat and that made me burst out laughing.

"Shirley, you just have to ask where they are, you know," Rivalz muttered.

"I know, I know, I'm sorry I couldn't help it," I apologized.

"Well, why don't you just call Lelouch?" He asked with a knowing grin.

"What's with that freaky grin?"

"Oh come on, you're clearly interested in him aren't you?" I can feel my face grow red.

"W-what? No, of course not."

"Whatever you say," Rivalz said as he takes a bite off his hamburger. I stared at my salad. I mean sure Lelouch is handsome, smart and appealing. But, he's flippant and clearly uninterested in hard work, a lot of girls overlook that.

"Shirley, I'll call him if you're that worried," Rivalz offered. I looked at him with a small smile and shook my head. Clearly, this isn't going anywhere so I struck a conversation with Rivalz about the upcoming trip which is everyone's favorite topic lately. We discussed about the excitement of it all for the rest of the lunch period.

When class ended for the day, I headed towards the clubhouse since there wasn't any swim practice today, tonly to find Milly, Nina and Rivalz already there. I sat down and couldn't help but realize Lelouch nor Suzaku weren't present.

With that being said, The door opened and Lelouch entered. But he wasn't wearing his school uniform, he was wearing a buttoned collared white shirt and slacks. Not bad.

"I apologize for being late," He said casually as he took the seat next to me. Milly smacked him on the head twice and lectured him about punctuality which made everyone else laugh. Typical Prez.

"Well, we have work to do," Milly began. "We leave for the camping trip this Saturday. So that gives us approximately three days to fully finish everything. First off, we need to have the guidelines and information that Nina typed up, made into copies so we can distribute them to every class so the teachers can read them to their students. Next, we need this years 1st years emergency forms properly filed according to their class numbers. Last but not least, we need someone to put up the flyers around school for the summer festival after the camp trip." She took a deep breath and smiled, a notion that she was finished.

"I just got tired listening to that," Rivalz commented, leaning at the back of his chair. It's true. It seems like a lot of work.

"Thats a lot of work," Lelouch mirrored my thoughts. "Who's assigned to what, then?"

"Well I was thinking Nina and I can make the copies then dis-" Milly started only to be interrupted by Rivalz.

"I can do it with you, Prez!" Rivalz sounded hopeful. Milly regarded him for a second, then conceded.

"Well, alright then, But you carry the stacks."

"Sure!"

"Then Nina can put the flyers around school herself," Milly paused to look at me. Hold on. So that means..

"Shirley, you and Lelouch stay here and organize the students' files," she said with a wink. I nodded mutely.

"Will do, Prez," Lelouch said. And with that, Lelouch and I were left alone. Lelouch broke the silence that followed.

"Milly sure is excited about this," Lelouch said.

"Yeah, considering it is the first trip of the school year and for us 1st years," I replied without looking at him.

"Anything you're excited for?"

"Well, Sight-seeing in Hokkaido, I haven't gotten out of the Tokyo settlement."

"Surprised you didn't say shopping, Shirley."

"That too, but that goes without saying. What about you?"

"I'm looking forward to being under the night sky," Lelouch started. I prodded him to continue. "One of the differences between the city and the great outdoors on the mountains is the air that we breathe. Here in the city, it's full of pollution. But when you're out there under the vast sky, the night sky is full of stars. They shine almost as brightly as the moon. It's a spectacle we city people can't experience because of all the lights and polluted air." My hands paused momentarily. Who knew Lelouch could be insightful.

"I'm now looking forward to it," I replied truthfully.

"I'm glad." Was he smiling? I still refused to look.

"Shirley, is something wrong?"

"No, why?"

"This morning, you were quite in a state," He paused. I stayed silent. "And now you haven't looked in my direction once since we were alone." Shoot, so he did notice.

"You're unusually forward today," I replied dryly.

"Suzaku's worried about you as well," Lelouch said offhandedly. That caught me off guard that I dropped the stacks of papers and looked at him. As soon as his eyes met mine I regretted it. I was reminded of my dream again, so I turned away.

"Something is wrong."

"I'm fine."

"I'll stop pushing, but whatever you're troubled about, it couldn't hurt to try to solve it." He's right. Considering, my dream IS about him, he had the right to know. So I told him all about my dream, to my reaction when I woke up.

"What do you think it means?" He asked. I thought about it for a minute and answered.

"Truthfully, I havent put much thought to it before," I replied. "But, thinking about it now, I think it has nothing to do with me at all. If anything, it has more to do with you. I think based on the distorted image of you alone, it can have different meanings. One is that you're obviously hiding something, or this front you're putting on is a fake persona. But I believe its, you're not who you seem to be." Ever so slightly his eyes reacted, but its meaning is something I couldn't comprehend. But his expression remained the same.

"I'm impressed, you came to that conclusion from just thinking about it in a short amount of time," He said.

"Well, yes." I returned to my work.

"So you're interested in me enough to dream about me?" I could hear the teasing laced in his voice.

"You wish, you're not my type," I giggled as I looked at him.

"I beg to differ," He replied with a chuckle as he looked back at me.

"Well you're wrong." Lelouch didn't reply, instead he turned the full intensity of his eyes on me. Those amethyst eyes, I felt like I was drowning in them.

"Actually, you are." I didn't break away, neither did he. It was pulling me in. I knew that once I was caught in its gravitation there was no way of getting saved from those unfathomable depths. Thing is, I didn't resist. I blushed when I realized I was subconsciously leaning slowly towards him. I quicky pulled away and swatted him on the shoulder as he laughed. I tried glaring at him, but ended up smiling, despite my continued reddened cheeks.

"Told you, I was right," He said still laughing.

"Shut up, you did that on purpose."

"Still worked."

"Did I interrupt something?" A voice came from the doorway. It was Suzaku, looking as if he was conflicted in whether to stay or to leave.

"No, come help us," I said, blushing as to whether he saw the whole ordeal or not. He stayed rooted to the spot.

"Cmon, we need help with these," Lelouch said casually. Suzaku, hesitated, but then took a seat across from me and took half of mine and Lelouch's papers.

"Thank you, this will go faster now," I said smiling at him. He smiled back and nodded. Conversation flowed easily after that, and soon enough we were done. I was the first to leave, and as soon as I was outside and was closing the door behind me I heard Suzaku's voice ask Lelouch "were you about to kiss?" I didn't stay to hear Lelouch's answer.

At about half past 10 I was sprawled on top of my bed just listening to classical music, when my phone vibrated. I turned on to my side to reach it on a table just by my bed. It was a text from Suzaku asking if I was still awake. I texted back that I was. A moment later my phone rang and I answered.

"Shirley, sorry to call so late but I need a favor from you." Suzaku's hurried voice perked my attention.

"Sure, is something wrong?"

"No, but can you come to the clubhouse tomorrow morning before class? Maybe, say about 6:30am?" I blinked in surprise.

"That early? I mean I can, but for what reason?"

"I have something for you to pass on to Lelouch, I can't reach him right now and I was informed he wasn't in his dorm room at the moment."

"I'm guessing you won't be able to give it to him tomorrow as well, right?"

"Well you see, I have to go back to the military base tomorrow morning for a couple days. I'm not positive I'll be able to see Lelouch before then."

"Understood, from the sounds of it, this thing must be important."

"Haha, depends on how you look at it. He asked me for it a couple days ago. Said he needed it tomorrow."

"I wonder what it is, though it's none of my business."

"Sorry, Shirley."

"I'm kidding, Suzaku. Anyways, is that all?"

"Um, yes, sorry to bother you again." It was silent for few moments. But he hasn't hung up.

"Its no problem at all." I heard running water from the other line. "Are you in the bathroom?" I couldn't help but stifle a giggle.

"Yeah, was thinking of brushing my teeth. But you haven't hung up yet so.."

"Well, I can if you want me to."

"I will when we're done here." Another awkward silence. This time Suzaku broke it. "I really appreciate your kindness the first time we met." Whoa, that came outta nowhere.

"I wasn't being kind, I just wanted to be your friend."

"I know, and I'm glad we are. It's the reason why I chose to contact you first for this." I leaned against the wall and closed my eyes.

"Me too." After that, we discussed almost anything that came up. We ended talking for the next 2 hours. Suzaku's friendly nature and natural flow of charisma helps stem our conversations. We eventually had to get off because Sophie complained. I fell asleep almost immediately after.

I had another dream that would haunt me. It was an unsual case of deja vu, it was a replay of the scene in the clubhouse with Lelouch earlier that day. The scene where I told him what I thought my dream meant, that Lelouch isn't who he seems to be. I woke up, chills running down my spine. I understand now. His reaction, the look in his eyes, the one I couldn't comprehend earlier. I saw it clearly this time. It was the look that confirmed I was downright correct and he thought that it was something he must get rid of.

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><p><strong>AN**:Thank you so far guys, really appreciate it. On another note, things are taking quite a dark turn this chapter isn't it? I have several friends from my college that read this story and they are HUGE Shirlulu fans and they also find the SuzaShir pairing appealing as well. They told me, I should make it a bit more darkerrr-ish. Haha, anyways, I appreciate everything everyone. Till next chapter.


	4. Burning of Memories

**A/N**: First off, sorry it took awhile, but I appreciate all the alerts, etc! I was busy with moving houses and college so please forgive me. But in a good note, I'm back and I actually have the next few chapters done so yes :) that's all for now! Enjoy :)

**Disclaimer**: Why do I always forget to mention that I don't own Code Geass or anything associated with it?

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><p>I bolted up, shaking. My eyes started the process of adjusting to the dark. The air suddenly felt ice cold, even though the summer nights were around. Cold sweat ran down my body and face. I ran a hand through my matted hair and pulled the covers around me, still shivering. I hated this. These dreams about Lelouch keeps happening and I still don't have an idea to why it happens to me. But that brief recognition in his eyes frightened me more than anything. It was...what was it? Dangerous. I always knew Lelouch was different, from the very first day I saw him. But it was always in a good way. He was mysterious. But I never knew much about Lelouch's background, he kept it to himself. The only person who would know is Suzaku, or maybe Prez. Maybe I could ask one of them. On second thought, I better not. But it makes sense now. Lelouch's weird behavior afterwards. His actions and words didn't exactly fit him. He was in a way...flirting. I know now why. He wanted me to not put anymore thought in the matter of him. But what can I do? I'm already in deep. I laid back down and shut my eyes. I tried reciting a poem my dad would recite to me after a bedtime story when I was little.<p>

_Rest your head, little one,_

_Momma and Papa's here for you,_

_Well til up comes the sun,_

_The night has passed and day anew,_

_The dreams you had, won't you dare tell us?_

_Share them, for your heart is longing,_

_Start of time till the earth turns to dust,_

_The songbirds will keep on singing._

No luck, I couldn't sleep. I got up and went to the bathroom and stared at my reflection in the mirror. Messy hair, pale face. Ugh. Lovely. I splashed cold water to my face and went back to bed. Lelouch crossed my mind again. He's always gone and disappearing. He only gambles with Rivalz but he's gone even without Rivalz, and I'm sure he's not gambling during those times. Where would he be going? Especially in the middle of a war going on here in Japan, now known as Area 11, it's dangerous. Suzaku as well ever since he started attending Ashford. He could be going to the military base, that might be it. Except for that one night he was gone for. I might be thinking a little too hard into it. I tried pushing these thoughts to the back of my mind and attempted to fall asleep again. I successfully dozed off, only to be woken up at the vibration from under my pillow. My cellphone.

"Hello?" I answered groggily, half awake.

"Shirley? Did I just wake you?" Suzaku's voice knocked me to my senses. I bolted up and headed to the bathroom as I remembered.

"Shoot, sorry, I'll be right there!" I replied hurrily as I grabbed my toothbrush.

"Calm down, Shirley, it's not even 6," Suzaku sounding amused. I stopped dead in my movements and peeked in the room to the digital alarm clock. 5:09am. "Any reason you called me so early?" I struggled to keep my voice steady. Now I know why my alarm didn't sound off yet.

"Sorry, I just wanted to wake you up," Well he did sound like as if he meant it. I sighed.

"Alright, I'll be there before 6."

"See you." We hung up, and I jumped in the shower. I thought about seeing Suzaku in a while and suddenly the heat on my face wasn't just due from the luke warm water.

It was about 5:42 when I arrived at the clubhouse. Suzaku stood up and grinned at me. An automatic smile appeared on my face.

"Were you waiting long?" I asked as I sat down next to him. He shook his head and pulled out a square box with brown wrapping. It was small, and simple. I examined it in my hands and asked no questions about it.

"It'll be my first overnight camping trip," Suzaku brought up.

"Really? Weren't you and Lelouch classmates in middle school or elementary? Didn't your school do field trips?"

"Well..um, what about yourself?" He directed the question right back at me. I raised an eyebrow but answered anyways.

"No, I just met him this year."

"Were you always living here?"

"No, we moved here from the mainland." Suzaku looked away and didn't respond. "Do you think it'll be dangerous to go camping when there's terrorist around?" He chuckled.

"No, the military will be around, I can guarantee your safety," he assured me.

"That's right, at least you won't be working."

"If they need me, then I'd have to leave."

"But you're already gone enough as it is, Suzaku," I leveled him. He looked at me with surprise. I explained. "You and Lelouch are gone all the time, you two will fall back in your studies."

"Well, thanks for caring, but I'm sure I'll be fine," Suzaku grinned. He looked at the wall clock and stood up. "Time to go, I'll see you in a few days, Shirley." I stood up and suddenly felt my heart go heavy. "Don't look so sad, you're welcoming to text me anytime." Okay, now he was just teasing me.

"Hmph, as if I'm sad because of this," I crossed my arms and tried to look as if I didn't care but he just laughed at me. I glared at him until he lightly tapped my forehead with his pointer finger.

"See you later." And then he was gone. The heaviness I felt a little earlier was clearer now. I already missed Suzaku's presence. I had the itching feeling to text him, but thought better. I stared at the brown box on the table. I shook it gently and heard a soft clashing metal of some sort, then the door suddenly opened and Lelouch came in with Prez. I said a stiff good morning and Lelouch's gaze immediately went to the box. I told him it was from Suzaku.

"Thank you."

"Mm." I replied still looking at the box. He saw.

"You're curious like a cat, Shirley," Lelouch said casually. "You know the saying."

"Yes, curiosity killed the cat," I rolled my eyes at his remark.

"We're suppose to bring an item to class today," he paused, but I just raised an eyebrow. He sighed. "Our class is having a bonfire in the back campus today and we need an item to throw in the fire. Something you want to get rid off, in other words, leave behind." I smacked my hand to my forehead as it dawned on me.

"How can I forget?" I thought of one thing I wanted to throw away. But Lelouch cut short of my thoughts.

"You're not the forgetful type, Shirley," Lelouch sounded amused, which matched his expression. "I forget, you have had a lot in your mind lately. I can see bags under your eyes, not getting enough sleep lately?"

"As matter of fact, yes," I replied crossing my arms.

"Well I'm sorry to hear that," Lelouch not sounding sorry at all.

"You should be," I muttered under my breath.

"What was that?"

"Nothing, I have to go back to my room to get an item," I replied quickly and turned to head for the door. Milly had a complicated look on her face but I ignored it.

Back in my room, I searched through my drawers and pulled out a shoe box. I opened it and ruffled through it's contents until I found what I was looking for. I threw it in my bag and headed on my way to class.

I was several minutes early, I sat down on my chair and felt the emptiness right next to me. My roommate Sophie approached me.

"You look a little down," Sophie commented gently. I smiled at her.

"No, not really," I replied. She started to say something but stopped short as her attention was at the back of the class. All the girls who were talking loudly a second ago hushed as well. I turned around, and no surprise Lelouch entered with Rivalz. He knew he was the center of attention, as he confidently walked to his seat with Rivalz talking and him nodding.

He ignored the massive stares he's getting. "Sophie? I think you're drooling," I giggled at her content expression. She absently wiped her mouth and then turned her attention on me.

"No, I wasn't," she said with a grin. "Sorry, but Lelouch is so-"

"Arrogant? Flippant?" I offered innocently. She burst into fits of giggles.

"No, no, he's just alluring," she emphasized. I gave her a "sure, whatever" look. "I'm serious! I know you don't like his attitude but I'll wager you're interested." She winked at me, and I was loss for words. Good thing our teacher arrived so I didn't have to reply to that. She was explaining the importance of this item burning. My gaze fell on Lelouch. He was looking out the window, no surprise there. Well, yeah, Lelouch is interesting, I really have no problem admitting that. It's just that..

By the time we arrived at the farthest part of the campus the bonfire was created. The ember flames danced in the summer winds. It looked like a scene out of the beach. Literally. It was surrounded by sand to keep from spreading. I felt a tap on my shoulder and I turned around to find Rivalz accompanied by Lelouch and Nina.

"So, what's your item?" Rivalz asked. He was holding an old trophy, a bowling trophy.

"Well, you'll see," I replied with a grin. Nina was holding old test papers, where she scored low.

"I'm surprised you ever had low test scores, Nina." She smiled.

"Thank you." Lelouch was still holding the small box I handed him earlier. Mrs. Hart instructed us to line up and throw our item in the fire. The line was messy, of course. I was at the back of the line with Lelouch, Rivalz and Nina. Rivalz and Nina were holding their own conversation, and Lelouch looked like he had no interest in partaking in that. I noticed how his hand shook ever so slightly while gripping the brown box.

"Are you alright?" His expression remained passive. He nodded but didn't speak. "Lelouch, you don't seem like you want to part with that." He looked at me, still with an expressionless face. But his eyes, was full of emotions. He was conflicted.

"I do, it's part of the past," he replied firmly. I nodded.

"I understand. But the past does hold values," I stared at the fire straight ahead. "It's full of memories."

"What if it's memories you want to forget?" He asked all of a sudden. I stared at him, surprised. He didn't even attempt to cover for it.

"My life hasn't always been perfect," I said quietly. "Not a single person on this planet has a life like that. But I would never want to forget a single thing, ever."

"I know not everyone does want to. There are just some things that happen in life that you wished never happened or wanted to forget." This was the first time I ever heard him speak anything regarding life in general.

"But look, you're conflicted in trying to leave a part of your past behind," I regarded him gently. He stared straight in my eyes. Lelouch may have his own secrets..but i understand now. He's...

"Shirley, I think I'll skip the burning," Lelouch said suddenly. I stared at him as he walked away. I noticed we were straying behind. The end of the line was about 15ft away. I took out the photograph from my bag. I stared at it, until my eyes burned with unshed tears. It was the only picture I had of my father. Anger was bubbling in my chest. As my time for the item burning came nearer, I was conflicted as Lelouch was. My father, who I once loved and respected, tore our small, happy family apart. His decisions cost my mother her life. I, now stood in front of the fire. Lelouch couldn't leave a part of his past behind. I started to extend my hand with the photograph in my hand towards the fire. I thought over my words, 'There isn't a single thing in my life I wanted to forget.' I backed away quickly and clutched the photograph to my chest. As I walked away I caught Lelouch's gaze. He nodded once and looked away.

I was alone in the clubhouse after school. I had just received a text from Suzaku asking if Lelouch went through with the burning and I replied no. And that was it. Little did I know then, my interference with Lelouch's choice to burn his item, would have destructive consequences that would make me soon regret my very own words.

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><p><strong>AN**: I'll post the next chapter soon, and I can promise that things are getting ALOT more oo-lala :)


	5. Emerging of True Colors

**A/N**: I only recently posted the previous chapter and yet I've gotten alerts and hits, thank youuu very much! You guys give me motivation to try my best to make this better. Since I don't like torturing anyone of the wait, here's the promised chapter :D

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><p>I was alone in the clubhouse just doing last minute filings, when Milly came in. We greeted each other as she sat down.<p>

"Shirley, let's talk," she said. I sat down across from her and she hesitated for a second. Then her serious expression broke into a smile. "Girl talk time! So, what's going on with you and Lelouch?"

"Nothing," I answered truthfully as I could feel my cheeks grow warm.

"Oh come on, you can tell me. I saw the way you two were with each other earlier." I shook my head.

"I promise, there's absolutely nothing," I replied.

"I've noticed you have been acting a bit different with him recently," Milly said casually with a hint of teasing. I looked up in confusion. "You use to act reserved and shy around him, but now you're not afraid to be quite straightforward with him."

"Oh, I see."

"What's wrong?" Milly asked gently, her teasing mode gone. I was quiet for a second. Milly looked genuinely concerned but I wasn't sure if I should tell her how I was really feeling. But it's my chance to know.

"Prez, it's just that..Lelouch is um," I couldn't find a good way to explain it, but Milly understood in a way.

"Oh Shirley, he's always been like that," she smiled as if remembering a fond memory. "When I met him, he was just a middle school brat. He was quite pompous and arrogant." I giggled, not exactly surprised.

"So he hasn't change then, I guess."

"He has, he's gotten more polite now," Milly suddenly looked sad. "He's been through alot." I nodded, remembering my previous conversation with him at the bonfire.

"You know him quite well." Milly smiled and looked away.

"I guess I do."

That night I was packing for the camping trip while chatting with Sophie. When I was about done I received a phone call from Suzaku.

"Shirley, are you busy?"

"I'm almost done packing, what's up?"

"Give Lelouch a call will you and text me back if he responds."

"Um, alright," I agreed though confused as to why. I called Lelouch three times. The first two rang then went to voicemail while the third call went straight to voicemail. Jerk. I texted Suzaku that Lelouch never answered and he thanked me and replied he'd be back a day early and be here for school tomorrow.

When I entered class the following day Suzaku was already there reading a book. I snuck up behind him.

"Boo!" I brought my hands down on his shoulders. He jumped a bit and turned around, while I laughed at his shocked face. He joined me and I sat down next to him. We chatted idly about current events until classes started. Halfway through I glanced at the direction of Lelouch's desk and he was absent. I bet he's gambling..but Rivalz is here. I noticed Suzaku glance as well and he had a frown on his face. When the bell for lunch rang, I turned to Suzaku but he was already walking hurriedly out the door. I didn't bother to call out after him.

"Nice pouty face, Shirey," Rivalz joked as he came over with Nina.

"I am so not pouting," I stated managing a grin. We walked to the courtyard and met up with Milly.

"Lelouch and Suzaku gone again?" she asked.

"Yes, Lelouch was absent but Suzaku left somewhere after class," Nina replied timidly opening her lunch. After 10 minutes Milly and Nina left and it was just Rivalz and I. He had a burger again. I watched him open a pack of ketchup and mustard.

"You want some?" Rivalz asked noticing my stare as his gaze traveled to tomato salad lunch.

"No thank you, but you shouldn't always eat a burger you know, it's unhealthy," I nagged at him.

"Sure mom," he replied sarcastically. "You're wondering where Lelouch is, right?"

"No," I replied quickly.

"Well, he didn't tell me we were gambling today. So he might be busy or something."

"Thanks for unneeded information, Rivalz," I laughed.

"Anytime. So, is it Suzaku, you like?" I threw a baby tomato at his face.

After swim practice I headed to the clubhouse only to find Suzaku waiting outside the door.

"Shirley!"

"Suzaku?" He grabbed my wrist and pulled me inside.

"What's wrong?"

"I need to be tell you something," Suzaku said intently. I stared at his eyes. Then at his hand still around my wrist. Wait a minute. Is he about to..?

"Suzaku, um," I stammered blushing furiously. Suzaku looked confused for a second then turned red.

"No, it wasn't...about that," Suzaku fumbled. I had the urge to run but he still had hold of me. I can't believe I jumped to conclusions. Suzaku recovered. "Never mind, I wanted to tell you the reason I returned early." I nodded looking at my feet. Anywhere but his face. "I wanted to check up on Lelouch, to be honest." That sure caught me off guard.

"Lelouch? Why?"

"Well, it's about the burning item thing you guys did yesterday." I prodded for him to continue. "When he didn't answer any of my calls and you told me he didn't go

through with it, well, I just had to check on him. And now he's absent and his roommate said he hasn't seen him since class yesterday."

"Do you think he's okay?" I had a lump in my throat and it got difficult to swallow.

"Yeah, I'm sure. I just wanted to make sure," Suzaku tried laughing it off. But I knew he was lying.

He wouldn't have returned if he wasn't concerned. He returned because Lelouch never burned the item. And he was sure something was wrong.

"I'm going to look for him," I stated, making up my mind. I couldn't help but feel somewhat responsible. Lelouch was never gone for a day. Ever. Not to my knowledge anyways.

"You can't," Suzaku said intensely. He's had his grip around my wrist this whole time. I tried to pull free.

"Let me go, Suzaku," I warned him, surprised by his tone.

"You wouldn't know where to look," Suzaku reasoned. He's right, I didn't know. I hesitated for a second.

"I have some ideas, I have been going to school with him. He's probably in some casino or club around the area," I explained. I yanked my arm hard once more to free myself but Suzaku held on and pushed me not so gently against the wall trapping my hand besides my face. First instinct was to push him so I tried. But damn was he strong. The thoughts of trying to free myself dispersed just then as I became more aware of him. How his body was right against mine, that I could feel his body heat and how lean his muscles were. How his face was so close to mine that I could feel his breath tickling my face. How he smelled..like a guy. I couldn't move, I wasn't able to anyways, but it was as if all my energy disappeared; I relaxed. Suzaku's beautiful mossy green eyes traveled from my eyes to my nose to finally my lips. Slowly. Out of my control, my tongue wet my lips and Suzaku blinked twice then tilted his face inching a centimeter closer to mine. I held my breath. An alarm went off in my head screaming NO. I ignored it. His eyes closed and I started to close my eyes but snapped wide open when I noticed someone staring from the window outside. It was Lelouch.

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><p>As soon as I said Lelouch's name, Suzaku pulled away. We both stood there staring at Lelouch through the window, not speaking nor moving. My heart and mind was racing. I can't believe what just happened. No. What was ABOUT to happen. I couldn't even feel embarrassed, because seeing Lelouch overrode any other emotion. He just stared back at us, unblinking. Neither mad or shocked as to what he witnessed, not that he had any reason to be. Instead, he wore a faint smile. But why? I took several steps closer to the window and froze on my tracks. I took a better look at him and gasped. Lelouch was ghostly pale. His hair messy, not in it's usual grace. His clothes, which were school clothes, ruffled. This wasn't the Lelouch, I knew. He looked like he hasnt slept in days. Suzaku reacted faster than I did, because in record time he ran out the back door and to Lelouch. He yelled something inaudible and came flying his fist straight to Lelouch's face. I ran to them as Lelouch fell. Suzaku bent down and grabbed Lelouch's collar while pulling his other arm back, ready to strike again.<p>

"Stop!" I screamed at Suzaku. I was pulling his arm. "He hasn't done anything wrong!" Suzaku loosened his grip and let him go. I got in between them immediately, glaring at Suzaku. Suzaku's usual carefree demeanor was gone. Instead it was replaced with anger. He pointed a finger accusingly at me. No, at Lelouch.

"Take a damn good look at him, Shirley," Suzaku's voice trembled with rage. I turned around and bent down to Lelouch on the floor. Lelouch was staring straight at me, unshaken. With the same faint smile as before. I bit my lip, when it dawned on me that even though Lelouch was looking at me straight in my eyes, it seemed as if he held no recognition of my presence. He was staring right through me.

"What's wrong with him?" I whispered to no one in particular as I brought a hand up and gently touched his cheek. His face was cold. Suzaku ignored ime as he roughly pulled Lelouch to a standing position.

"Move," he demanded as I scrambled to the side, out of his way. He put Lelouch's arm around his own shoulders. "I'm taking him back to my dorm, his roommate can't see him like this." He started to drag a staggering Lelouch away, but I heard Lelouch. After all that, he finally spoke. It was so quiet, that I almost missed it. It held no understanding from me, but I knew it meant something. Lelouch said one word; a name.

Nunally.

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><p><strong>AN:** So do you think they should of kissed? Anyways, till next chapter! :D


	6. Beginning of the Camping Trip

**A/N:** Phew! Hello, everyone! It's been a long month hasn't it? Sorry, I had spring break but that doesn't mean I was procrastinating! When I went to the beach and I had an idea implementing this chapter that wasn't planned so it's a good sign. I actually had to do a bit of research here and it wasn't the most pleasant experience so please do correct me about Japan's geography if I'm wrong. Please do mind that this is a bit longer chapter than my usual. I think it's a pretty successful chapter, since I'll say now since you'll read anyway: It's Camping Time! Please read on and enjoy, I worked really hard on it :) Thank you so much to everyone's continued support. Please stay with me till the end of this story!

**Disclaimer**: I don't really own Code Geass, but after a lawsuit I might!

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><p>Nunally.<p>

Who could she be? A past girlfriend, maybe? Or maybe a friend? Family? I know, she must be important. Lelouch never seemed to take interest in females. He's polite to everyone around him in a standoffish way but he only really talks to the Student Council. He's popular with the ladies, despite that, the guys don't hate him. So who could Nunally be? And what was wrong with him? Lelouch's expression bothered me. Suzaku's reaction to him as well. My face suddenly felt hot, I'm glad neither boys were here to witness it. Plus, I almost kissed Suzaku. Thinking about it now, I'm more confused than ever. I'm half disappointed AND half relieved. I knew voluntarily I wouldn't have initiated it, but I was caught up in the moment. It almost felt...right.

The next day, was Saturday; camping trip. This day couldn't have arrived any faster.

"Shirley, hurry up," Sophie called out from the doorway. "We'll miss the bus!"

"Go on ahead," I replied as I packed my toothbrush in a small bag with other necessities. When Sophie had left I took an old frame and placed my father's photo along my mom's in it.

I packed it in my bag and left. Everyone was assembled at the front of the school gates. Ashford had a total of 498 students ranging from 1st to 3rd year. There was several long buses parked by the sidewalk as students stood and mingled with their classmates. I squeezed my way to the front where my class were to find Suzaku, Lelouch, Rivalz and Nina together. I slowed my pace. Lelouch seemed like his old self. What's stranger was that both him and Suzaku were both talking and laughing together. Did yesterday really happen? What the heck is going on?

"Shirley, over here!" Rivalz waved me over. Suzaku and Lelouch both turned to my direction, smiling in greeting. Surprised, I forced a small smile back.

"It seems as if our class is sharing the bus with 1-B," Nina stated quietly. We turned to see class 1-B join our messy, and already crowded mass of people at the front. The atmosphere seemed relaxed. Everyone's excited talks could be heard all around. We filed in at the very back of the bus that all five of us fit. With Lelouch in the middle, Suzaku and I at his side and Nina and Rivalz at the ends. Nina and myself held our own conversation as the boys started cracking jokes. I could feel Lelouch tense up as Rivalz asked him a question.

"Where were you yesterday, Lelouch? You better have not been playing chess without me."

"You caught me," Lelouch fessed up. I knew he was lying but I didn't comment.

"Shirley?" That was Nina. It seemed I wasn't paying attention when she said something. I looked at her apologetically.

"I'm sorry, what was it again?"

"I was saying you look a bit tired, maybe you should rest a bit," Nina suggested. I smiled at her and nodded.

"How long will it be till we reach the airport?"

"About 45 minutes, then we have a 2 hour flight to New Chitose Airport. Then a 45 minute bus ride to Sapporo, Hokkaido." I stared at her in amazement. She blushed and looked away. I leaned back comfortably and closed my eyes. Drowsiness overtook my senses that the fact I was uncomfortable with my situation with Lelouch and Suzaku was put away for now. When I came to, we were pulling up at the Tokyo Airport parking lot. I kept my eyes shut as I realized my position was different. I tensed up. I was laying my head on Lelouch's shoulder and I was leaning on him. He was still talking with Suzaku and Rivalz, as if he was indifferent. My mind raced as to how to get out of this at the most natural way.

"Shirley? We're here," Lelouch whispered in my ear. I had no choice but to fake myself waking up.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to sleep on your shoulder." He looked away and shrugged, at the same time I caught Suzaku's eye. We both looked at each other until the bus stopped and we all had to get our luggages and bags and get off.

I slept during the 2 hour plane ride, as well as the ride to Sapporo, Hokkaido. I needed to get caught up on this much needed sleep. This time around I made sure I was sitting by the window next to Nina. I fell asleep easily until a sudden free falling feeling in my stomach woke me up. We were going down a hill and were entering the city line of Sapporo. I stared in awe at the sight of the city with it's tall buildings that I momentarily wished I had brought my camera. Some time later the bus entered the woods at the side of Mt. Okura and into a huge clearing; the campgrounds. The feeling of excitement was in the air. I knew I had a grin planted on my face as I scanned the area. It was a huge camping ground with a luxurious lodge plated with the Ashford crest. So much for Lelouch's star gazing. I giggled to myself as I turned to look at him. He had the same grin as everyone else and it surprisingly made me feel at ease; it was genuine. Once off the bus, everyone headed to the lobby to get their assigned room card key. As I made my way to my room in the 2nd floor, I heard my name being called. I felt a blush creeping on my face as as I recognized the voice. I wasn't ready for this, I knew that. But I had to face it; it was now or never. I composed myself and turned.

"Suzaku? Is this your hallway too?" He strode over to me and gave a small nod.

"And yours?" He glanced down on my card key. "Seems like we're neighbors."

"Huh?" He held up his card. Sure enough his was Room 78 and mine was 76.

"Shirley," Suzaku began sounding hesitant. We avoided looking at each other, knowing what was coming our way. "I want to apologize for last night." What would he be apologizing for? For his little exhibition with Lelouch or our...

"Please, don't apologize," I replied. I couldn't help but feel a bit down thinking he was apologizing for our almost contact.

"I want to. It wasn't fair for you," Suzaku looked solemn. I felt the weight of his eyes on my face as he finally looked at me. My heart thumped a tad faster than usual. So he was apologizing for THAT. How could I let him know there was nothing to it without making it sound the wrong way? I finally looked up to reply but stopped. I knew I would react this way in this situation. He was close but not close enough to touch. He had an apologetic expression but his eyes had more to say. My gut feeling told me it was the look that was worried whether or not I hated him for that almost contact. His eyes gave me a wave of emotion. Feeling overwhelmed at the sudden feeling, I reacted. I knew why I felt the way I did earlier when I saw him with Lelouch. I was scared. Scared of what happened last night. No, not about our almost kiss. About the gentle natured Suzaku not being himself. He almost kissed me and punched Lelouch, that was completely out of character of him. I wanted the sunny, friendly Suzaku that laughed and joked with me. I saw it this morning and I was happy. I felt his warmth as I close the space between us and buried my face on his neck. I closed my eyes and inhaled his scent. He didn't pull away, instead he put a hand at the back of my head. Time seemed to stand still, and I wished all the pain and misunderstanding in this world disappeared. I didn't know why I did this, I just wanted to. Nothing more, nothing less.

"Oh." At the sudden noise we were pulled back to reality. It was Sophie standing 10 feet from us, she had a surprised look on her face. She managed a smile and apologized. "I'm so sorry, I'll be leaving now." As she turned Suzaku spoke up.

"I'll be going first. See you later, Shirley," Suzaku hurriedly dashed to the end of the hallway and went inside a room. Sophie turned to me as soon as Suzaku was out of sight. She was grinning from ear to ear. I fidgeted at the strap of my duffel bag.

"I won't ask now." Sophie surprised me. "What room are you in?" Fortunately, it turned out we were in the same room. As we settled in our room, Sophie finally had enough and asked me.

"Are you two dating?" I blushed at the question and shook my head. "Then explain what that was all about out there?" I put a finger on my lips. I remembered Suzaku's room was next to ours, "Relax, the rooms has thick walls, he won't hear."

"I don't know, Sophie," I sighed as I plopped down on one of the beds. Sophie sat on the other bed. "I thought I didn't hold anything special for him. But now, I'm not so sure."

"I didn't expect you to fall for him," Sophie commented, I stayed silent waiting for her to say more. "I always thought it'd be Lelouch." That's right, Lelouch. I groaned and covered my face. I never seriously liked a guy before so I wouldn't know, this confusing feeling was all new for me. "Maybe one of them will confess to you in this trip." I stifled a giggle. Lelouch and Suzaku confess? No way.

"What makes you say that?"

"Uh, hello? We're in a school trip. Besides festivals, school trips have a reputation for couples blossoming and people confessing." She's right.

"They aren't the type of guys to confess. Besides, I don't mean anything to them in that way." Then why did I feel disappointed in that?

"We'll see. I wonder when you'll realize your feelings?" I just rolled my eyes at her and smiled. Awhile later, I was alone in my room, I walked to the balcony and leaned against the railing. What a perfect view. The blue lake glittered and sparkled against the sun's rays. It was stunning. After I had showered and changed into a pair of shorts and tank I headed down to the lobby to find Milly and an elderly lady sitting down on one of the long couches. As I approached them I realized what was going on. Milly was with a fortune teller.

"Ah, Shirley, this is Madame Zuzu." Milly introduced as I held out my hand. Madame Zuzu took my hand but didn't shake it. Instead she held on and turned my palm facing up. I glanced at Milly and she just nodded in reassurance so I turned back to Madame Zuzu. She had a crease line on her brow as she concentrated on my palm. She finally let go and took out a deck of cards. Tarot cards. She laid down three cards face down on the table.

"I have to make sure.." She muttered quietly. She flipped the cards one by one. The first one was two separated hearts with a sash on one and a crown on the other. The second one was an eye, it was very strange. The background was black while the eye color was purple. And finally, the last one was a pavement, marbled road leading to a huge golden gate illuminated by light. I was absorbed at the details that I wasn't aware of Lelouch and Rivalz approaching us. Lelouch was in casual clothes, a collared, white buttoned polo shirt and tan shorts. I'll admit he looked a whole lot more attractive than usual as if that was possible. Madame Zuzu finally spoke up.

"Beware of the man with the shifting eyes, my dear," Madame Zuzu warned in a low, mysterious voice. "I foresee him holding your fate in his hands, he has the power to change your destiny." But Milly wasn't interested in that.

"How's her love life looking?" She asked with enthusiasm. I noticed Lelouch glance at Madame Zuzu.

******"I'm getting to that. It looks enlightening she's met her husband and soulmate already," Madame Zuzu smiled for the first time.

"You're so lucky, Shirley. Your soulmate and husband in one? That's a bonus!" Milly looked eagerly at me. I grinned back at her not knowing how to respond.

"No, not quite," Madame Zuzu interrupted. We snapped our attention to her. "I see two men. Her husband and her soulmate, two different people. But..if the man with the shifting

eyes won't allow it, then it's pointless to hope that path is no longer available for you to travel on." Her words chilled me. With that, she walked away and disappeared in the crowd of people. There was a tense atmosphere surrounding us but thankfully Milly broke the ice.

"I wonder who those guys are," she mused as she winked at me. I thankfully smiled at her.

"Those kinds of things are pointless," Lelouch spoke up staring at the random crowds of people. "There's no reason for you to believe in such nonsense."

"C'mon Lelouch, you know they're just having fun," Rivalz nudged him playfully.

"Still," Lelouch concluded, shrugging. He gave us a nod and walked away.

"What's with him? Seems like he's in a bad mood," Milly asked Rivalz.

"He's fine. He's probably jealous, hoping he was Shirley's soulmate," Rivalz winked at me. I laughed it off but a part of me was happy even though Rivalz was joking.

"Well, don't forget we have our first event tonight," Milly said a little loudly changing the subject. "At 4 we're doing the Test of Courage."********

"That's right! We'll be heading into the woods during the night, right?" I was excited. Milly seemed pleased with my enthusiasm.

"Yes! We'll be going in pairs." All three of us headed outside to the direction where the lake was.

"Hopefully, it won't rain," Rivalz muttered staring up at the sky. It was cloudy, hopefully it'll pass. As we walked in silence by the woods, apart from everyone else around us, we heard voices. I ignored it but Milly grabbed my wrist and pulled me closer to the trees.

"Milly, wha-" I started to ask but she put a finger on her lips and pointed behind me. I turned around and saw two people. Suzaku and a girl. I stood there, planted on my feet until I got pulled behind a bush crouching down.

"I don't think we should be eavesdropping," Rivalz whispered. I agreed, despite my climbing curiosity. The girl spoke up redirecting our attention back at her.

"I'm sorry, I called you out here, Suzaku," the girl said avoiding his eyes. I already knew where this was leading to. I had a battle waging inside me.

"No problem, Janet, right? What is it?" Suzaku answered with a smile.

"He's so dense, can't he tell she's called him out to confess?" Milly muttered. I cringed just having my thoughts confirmed out loud.

"I know we hardly know each other, but I've always watched you," the girl named Janet spoke loudly and confidently now. She looked up and no longer avoided his eyes. Suzaku looked surprise but let her continue. "Ever since you came to Ashford, I've seen how you overcame how people treated you differently. How you held your head up straight and remained optimistic despite how people judged you because you were different."

"Wha-?"

"Because of your friendly nature, everyone accepts you now."

"I didn't do it all on my own, the student council helped me relax and realize I had friends here," Suzaku stated and smiled gently at her. I knew the battle waging inside me was over: I was jealous. But I wasn't happy about it. "It all began thanks to Lelouch." Lelouch. That's right, they were friends from way back. Janet smiled then started blushing furiously.

"B-but...b-ecause of that..." Janet stammered. "I ...like you." Suzaku's eyes widened at the confession then he sheepishly rubbed the back of his head with his hand while he looked on the ground. It was silent after that. The girl looked like she was about to cry. I felt really bad for her and regretted being jealous. But that wasn't the issue at hand here.

"Suzaku, you idiot, answer her," Rivalz hissed. Suzaku took a deep breath then finally spoke up.

"Janet, thank you," Suzaku began. At this time I had my back to them and started to walk away until I heard his next words. "But I can't accept your feelings, I'm sorry." I turned back to see Janet sadly smile at him.

"I knew I'd be rejected," Janet said putting on a cheerful face. She turned to walk away but then she turned back at him. "I hope she accepts your feelings, Suzaku." Suzaku looked surprised and grinned.

"Maybe," was his reply. Janet left and Suzaku remained at his spot. He looked like he regretted breaking her heart. Milly whispered that we should leave him be and we did.

"My, my, who knew Suzaku would be such a stud," Milly said. I didn't comment as Rivalz and her discussed the possibility of Suzaku falling for that girl.

I napped under the shadow of the trees after with Milly during the rest of the afternoon, when I was woken up by her. The sun was setting but it was already beginning to dim because of the clouds getting thicker by the hour.

"Shirley, we have to begin the Test of Courage." I got up and followed her to the front of the lodge where many students were gathered. Rivalz holding a megaphone stood in the middle with Suzaku and Nina.

"I'm sorry we're late," I apologized as we neared them.

"No worries, we already explained how this will go and everyone's paired up at the board," Rivalz motioned to the papers on the mini board.

"Huh. Not bad," Milly grinned at Rivalz.

"See Prez, we can handle things without you."

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves now!" As they were talking I wandered to the mini board and checked to see who I was paired with. As soon as I found my name and read the name next to mine I had mixed emotions. Out of all people why him? I walked back to the group slowly.

"Are the pairings chosen at random?" I asked looking at Nina. Nina nodded as I heard Rivalz laugh. I gave him a small, suspicious frown because I knew somehow he had a hand in this.

"Have fun with Lelouch," he winked at me. I crossed my arms trying and failing to hide my annoyance.

"Where is Lelouch?" Milly asked Rivalz. Suzaku shrugged and walked to the same girl he was with earlier. Janet, was it? Rivalz definitely rigged this since it's be too much of a coincidence.

"I'm not sure, but he better get back soon or he'll miss it."

"Well it cant be helped, if he isn't here." Milly looked somewhat pleased.

"Shirley, go look for him, he went by the lake earlier. Don't forget to take a flashlight," Rivalz said as he handed me a flashlight. I took it and gingerly held it in my hand. I walked away from the crowd and walked towards the back of the lodge to the lake. There wasn't anyone there considering it's almost dark so I switched my flashlight on. I walked to the edge of the woods when I spotted a black backpack on the ground. As I neared I recognized who it belonged to, I grabbed it and swung it over my shoulders. I picked up my pace and stood before the woods not knowing what'd I'd find. In the far off distance I heard a loud popping noise. The signal start of the Test of Courage. The sun had set and it was eerie at how dark it was, but I was determined to find him. Just before I entered the woods, I felt something cold trickle down my neck. It started raining so I ran in, the trees' leaves thick enough to guard me from the wetness. I noticed a dim light deeper in the woods. I navigated slowly through uneven paths until I reached it. My heart raced as I spotted him. A brief smile lit up across my face until I saw what he was holding. Refrain. He was sitting, leaning against a tree holding it in his hands just staring at it. I approached him slowly not wanting to startle him. Lelouch looked up at me in surprise then looked away.

"Lelouch.."

"Please leave, don't you have to do the Test of Courage?" He asked as I went to stand in front of him. I ignored his question as the pieces clicked together in my mind. Things started making sense.

"That..that was in the box wasn't it?" I questioned him quietly. His hands shook as he nodded feebly. "But why?"

"You said so yourself. I wasn't ready to leave my past behind."

"But this isn't what I meant! For you to succumb into going back doing this..." He stood up and faced me.

"I need you to leave. I can't do this while you're here," Lelouch laughed. In the pit of my stomach rage was building. I was here trying to do something and he didn't even give a damn. Tears threatened to spill over.

"Please stop, I don't know why you're doing this to yourselves but it gives you no merit!" Lelouch's expression softened for a second then it vanished.

"This isn't any of your business," he snapped at me and threw his refrain at a tree. The glass shattered. He picked up his flashlight and darted deeper into the woods. Without a second thought, I went after him. Normally, Lelouch isn't the most athletic guy, okay, he's hopeless. But he was determined to get away from me that he was faster than usual, but something told me I had to keep chasing after him. I called after him but he didn't slow down. I wasn't paying attention to anything else but him so no wonder I lost my footing. I didn't realize we were alongside by a hill. The last thing I remembered was the excruciating pain on my left arm and head as I landed 10 feet down. The next few minutes was a blur. I remember being wet as the trees protection wasn't in this side of the woods.

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><p>When I woke up I was laying down on the floor of a cave. An oil lamp dimly lit the cave. The pain in my arm and forehead was numbing a little. How'd I get here? At the mouth of the cave I saw a figure walking. It was Lelouch drenched with rain holding his backpack.<p>

"Sorry, that I left you here for a bit. I had to get the backpack from when you fell," he said as he sat down across from me opening his backpack.

"Where are we? What happened?" I asked still a bit hazy. He looked outside as the rain pounded.

"When you fell, I went to check if you were okay but I slipped as well," Lelouch laughed. "Good thing, a small bush growing cushioned my fall, but you weren't so lucky. We're

fortunate this cave was nearby since we are a bit far off from the lodge."

"What happens now exactly?" I was trying to register this all in my thoughts. Lelouch's amethyst eyes locked with mine suddenly.

"You're hurt," Lelouch started cautiously. "It's raining pretty hard...so I think we might have to stay here for now." His last words seemed hesitant. Even in the glow of the lamp I can see he was blushing. As his words sunk in, my heart raced. We were both hungry, exhausted. Lelouch and me. Alone in this cave. I knew it'd be a long, long night.

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><p><strong>AN**: Thanks for sticking with me, everyone. Please review for it'll help me for future chapters and stories. Thank you very much!

******:This actually came from one of my most favorite Korean Drama called Boys Over Flowers. It's not c/p from the drama but it's where I had my inspiration from for this scene.

********:Test of Courage, not sure if thats the official name, but it's something that's quite popular at high school in Japan if I'm correct. It can vary from different things but it's like a dare. For this story they have to go into the woods in the dark, so yes I just wanted to clear that up.


	7. Mine and His Alone

**A/N: Hello everyone, I'm back! I want to first apologize for the loooong wait, I know, I know it's been literally months. But don't think I have forgotten this story, not even for a moment. Ive had a few messages from readers about the continuation of this story and it made me very happy! I wasn't expecting that, it was a pleasant surprise that my readers are still awaiting the anticipation of this story. I've recently finished exams and now it's my break and i'm back at home so I'm pleased to announce I'll be uploading the next few chapters easily now. **

**Well this chapter was suppose to be twice as long, but I decided to split it into two seperate chapters. Once again, thank you for your patience and your loyalty to this story. Please regard me kindly till the end of the story. Enjoy! :)**

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><p>The steady rhythm of raindrops that pounded against the cave's rooftop filled the silence that stretched on between Lelouch and I. I avoided looking at him, and instead focused my sight on the small oil lamp that separated us. I tried to keep my pulse steady. Just Lelouch and I? For the night? This can't be happening to me. Most would consider me lucky, but I wasn't keen on being alone with him. A movement from Lelouch made me push myself back against the hard rock wall. I felt a soft fabric brush against my hand and I realized it was a balled up clothing. Looking up, Lelouch met my eyes with a stony stare.<p>

"Get changed or else you'll catch a cold," he told me flatly. He walked toward the entrance and sat with his back to me with a towel in hand. Geeze, why am I so jumpy? Lelouch just did me a favor and all I've done is think negatively of the situation. Feeling a little embarrassed, I quickly changed into the sweatshirt he had given me, which was ONLY slightly bigger on me. I delicately sniffed it and I recognized Lelouch's scent immediately. More than that, Lelouch and I are roughly the same size. My cheeks burned with horror at the thought. I glanced at Lelouch's figure and a wave of emotion washed over me. I was looking at the back of someone who shouldered a lot of burden. Someone who seemed just fine in the surface, was not. I forced myself to stand and join him. As I sat down slowly next to him, I noticed how his body stiffened up. I drew my knees to my chin and wrapped my arms around it.

"Thank you." Despite him not answering, I knew he had heard me. He cast me a sideway glance as a small smirk formed at the corner of his mouth.

"I don't know whether to be offended that my sweatshirt fit you just right." I narrowed my eyes at him as I felt a vein pop.

"You should be embarrassed to call yourself a man," I quickly shot back.

"And you consider yourself a woman?" I tried to refrain from trying to crack his pencil neck and turned away crossing my arms. I heard his low chuckle and it somehow got me to relax. "Lelouch, can I ask you something?" I knew the atmosphere between us was just right and I was about to ruin it. But I couldn't help it any longer.

"You were bound to anyways." I took that as a yes.

"Who's Nunally?" I blurted out. I had a completely different question in mind, but that was the question I managed to ask. Another silence formed, and I quickly regretted my words. "You don't have to answer, it's out of place anyways."

"She's my sister," he replied in an emotionless voice. Sister? A confusing, wave of relief overtook me.

"Ah." Was all I could manage without giving away my feelings right at the moment.

"Is that all?" I nodded despite the questions that stuck at the base of my throat; like the fact that he was using refrain, the big elephant in the room. He turned his face the other way so I couldn't see his expression. Being this close, I could feel the electrifying heat emanating from his body despite the cold weather. It made me feel warm. We stayed that way, Lelouch and I. Eventually, the silence grew into a comfortable rhythm. My mind drifted to Suzaku. I wondered what he was doing right now. Was he with that girl who confessed to him? I shook my head to release those thoughts. I'm being spiteful. I shouldn't have these small waves of jealousy. I let out a loud, frustrated sigh. "Thinking about someone?" What the heck? Can he read minds? "From the surprise look on your face, I'm guessing I was correct."

"Lelouch, why did you have have a backpack? Were you going somewhere?" I decided to redirect the attention on him.

"Not exactly," Lelouch replied offhandedly. I knew he wasnt telling the truth, but I decided to not push any further. "Were you my partner?" He added. Oh right, the Test of Courage should be done by now. "Yeah."

"Then no one would look for us," Lelouch stated as I peeked at him from the corner of my eyes. "Rivalz drew the partners. He basically set us up, so I'm positive no one would be looking for us, yet." Oh my gosh, he was right. The next time I see Rivalz...

"I'll get him back," I muttered.

"I may be willing to help you," Lelouch mused thoughtfully. I glanced at him and let out a small giggle.

"What's with you now?" He gave me a small sudden smile that made my heart beat faster.

"Huh? Why is your cheeks turning red?" He asked with a confused expression.

"Because I may be running a fever," I replied quickly, turning away from him as I silent cursed myself. For a genius like Lelouch, he can be very slow at times. I felt a cold hand gently cup my cheek and I quickly pulled back in surprise.

"You do seem a little warm," Lelouch commented with a slight hint of concern in his eyes. I quickly averted mine and my words came out flustered.

"Well, I wonder why, Lelouch!" I blurted out. Lelouch looked quizzically at me. He stared hard at me for a moment as I felt my palms begin to sweat. "What is it?"

"I have to ask," he began. "Why have you stopped calling me Lelou?" He hesitated on his nickname as I blinked in surprise at the question.

"Isn't it bothersome?" I replied back slowly.

"You always called me by that name," Lelouch continued. "But around the time Suzaku came, you stopped. Is there a connection?"

"What are you implying?" I asked, baffled.

"I'm simply curious." I raised an eyebrow at him.

"Do you want me to call you that?" I queried as he shrugged.

"Beats me," He answered. "It's troublesome."

"Oh? The more reason to call you that...Lelou," I emphasized before I burst into a fit of giggles.

"You are indeed a troublesome girl," Lelouch replied as he held his hand over his face. It took me a moment to realize he was holding himself of laughter. He eventually gave in and laughed freely. I joined him, knowing this was the first time he laughed freely WITH ME. More than that, it may be the first time in a long while we've had a comfortable conversation. It felt like we were truly friends.

"I thought it would be so bad to be stuck here with you.." I began, feeling a little bold. "But now, I think I'm starting to change my mind. You're not so bad."

"Hm," he had a small hidden smile on his face. The cold, stoic prince I thought I knew, wasn't here. Without giving it a second thought, I moved closer to him. "Lelou." His eyes locked on with mine, and his amethyst eyes never looked more beautiful than they did right at that moment. My words caught in my throat, I completely forgot what I wanted to say to him. The small act of gentleness rocked me as his slender fingers lightly tucked a stray strand of hair behind my ear, accidentally caressing my cheek in the process. His gaze was piercing, but I couldn't look away. I held my breath, my heart racing faster and faster. Time stood still for a moment as we both gazed at each others eyes. His face is so close...just a little more and...

"It stopped raining," he announced as he pulled away suddenly and stood up. I heard his footsteps fade as he walked outside. I stayed rooted to my spot as my heart was still beating uncontrollably. I'm grateful he didn't stay around. I need to recollect myself because through that ordeal I realized I didn't breath once. I took a deep breath and walked to my consecutive spot deeper in the cave in front of the oil lamp. He was teasing me, wasnt he? My mind was blank as I waited for him. Soon after Lelouch sat across from me and leaned against the rocks. He closed his eyes without saying a word. I silently studied his relaxed expression. What did he think of that moment? Is he thinking about it right now? As I studied him, I thought to myself..who knew Lelouch could look a lot younger like this. I hugged my knees to my chest as I lowered my gaze to the dim lamp. It was flickering now, almost out. "Your hair looks lovely in this light," Lelouch suddenly spoke up just as the light went out. In utter darkness, I was glad he wasn't able to see my expression. I wonder if he saw me staring at him. He was definitely teasing me. I wasn't very fond of my hair color; strawberry blonde. But he complimented it, and my heart fluttered because of it. I remembered this was the second time Lelouch and I almost kissed. Maybe it only seems like it in my end..unlike Suzaku's case. But this seemed different. Very different, but I couldn't figure out why it was as sleep overcame me. My last thought: I didn't want this night to end.

I woke up in a daze as I could see a bit of light from outside. It was still dark, but it seemed like the clouds has cleared and the moon was out. I glanced towards the dim light of the entrance of the cave and saw Lelouch just outside. I rubbed my eyes of sleep as I walked and stood beside him. I tilted my head upward and was immediately overwhelmed. Lelouch finally got his star gazing. The stars glittered across the night sky, looking like diamonds. I noticed right away they were as bright as the moon, Lelouch was right. This was a spectacle to see.

"Nice isn't it?"

"It's beautiful, I haven't seen that many stars," I gushed as I clasped my hands together. We both stood there, enjoying the sight. When suddenly Lelouch pointed.

"Look, Shirley," I followed his finger and spotted another one streak across the sky.

"Shooting stars?" I asked in amazement as another one appeared and disappeared just as quickly.

"Technically, you're wrong. But at least you got the right idea," Lelouch chuckled.

"Make a wish, Lelou," I teased as he looked at me and grinned.

"Such a kid," he replied. I closed my eyes and the first thing that popped in my mind surprised me. I shook it off and tried making a wish. I couldn't make make up my mind and I eventually gave up.

"What'd you wish for?" I asked.

"If I tell you it won't come true," Lelouch replied jokingly as I playfully shoved him.

"I'm glad I witnessed this with you."

"Same." We both looked at each other and smiled, our words and feelings genuine, as streaks of dawn began to appear over our heads. I didn't think of what lay ahead of us, in our future. I didn't care at the moment what awaited us. I knew that this night, this moment was mine and his alone. It was enough for me.

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><p><strong>AN: Please review and let me know what you thought of this chapter :) I've already completed the next few chapters and things will only get better from here and out, thanks for being so supportive everyone! **


	8. Not So Bad, Afterall

**A/N: Well, it's been a long while hasn't it? I deeply apologized, but the support I've gotten even though there hasn't been an update in years, really fueled me to post again. So thank you so much! It'll make me really happy if you all come back and continue to support this story. I think I've gotten the motivation back, so if you'll all let me I'll love to continue and eventually finish this story again. Without further ado, here's chapter 8.**

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><p>"You got everything?" I asked as I watched Lelouch hoist his backpack on his shoulders. He gave me an affirmative nod and we headed on our way.<p>

Lelouch admitted to me he knew the way back, much to my dismay. Letting him lead the way, it wasn't difficult to keep up with him. Lelouch wasn't athletic at the very least. I casually teased him about it as we navigated our way through thick leaves and the uneven path. Other than that, we didn't talk much. We took a few breaks along the way, for Lelouch's sake. As an athlete myself, I was pretty confident in my stamina. Then finally, we arrived at the campgrounds. I noticed as we walked through the lobby, not very many students were awake yet. Lelouch and I climbed the stairs until he arrived at his hallway. He nodded at me as we parted way without much a word. I hesitated until he disappeared in his room without turning back, much to the small disappointment rising up inside me. I sprinted to the direction of my room, shaking it off, until I stopped dead in my tracks just as I passed Suzaku's room.

"Shirley, you're back." I turned to face him as he stood in front of his door, still in his pajamas. I giggled as he laughed. "I just woke up." Surprised, I didn't hear his door open.

"Morning, sleepyhead," I chirped cheerfully at him. His grin disappeared as his gaze locked on my shirt.

"Is that...Lelouch's?" He asked with his eyes wide. Somehow it felt like I was someone who got caught cheating.

"Yeah. You see, it rained and-" I started to say until Suzaku interrupted.

"I see," Suzaku grinned as he rubbed the back of his head, avoiding my eyes.

"Well, let me explain.." I could feel the misunderstanding get stronger by the second.

"Later, okay? I'm still sleepy, I'll see you later," Suzaku called out as he closed his door. I had the sudden childish urge to knock on his door and yell at him to come out. I let out a sound of exasperation as I knocked on my room door. A moment later, Sophie emerged rubbing her eyes.

"Shirley?" Sophie mumbled sleepily.

"Long story," I replied moodily as I walked past her and into the room. "I'll explain later." I headed straight in the bathroom and threw all my clothes off and jumped in the shower, while I tried washing all my frustrations away.

"So, did you two do it?" Sophie asked eagerly as she watched me comb my wet hair after I was done.

"Of course not!" I exclaimed. "Nothing happened. We got stranded in some cave when it was storming last night."

"I see." She laid back down on her bed, clearly disappointed.

"You don't believe me, do you?" I asked as I plopped down on top of my bed.

"I do. It's just that.." Sophie trailed off.

"What is it?"

"Everyone knew you and Lelouch were gone, Shirley," Sophie informed me as she plopped her chin on her hands. "Well except the teachers. A lot of students thought you two wanted some alone time."

"Seriously?" I asked as I covered my face, which I could feel slightly burning.

"You okay?"

"Suzaku and I saw each other this morning," I mumbled. "He thinks something happened as well."

"That is trouble," Sophie agreed as I peeked at her through my fingers. "I mean, you were gone for a night with a boy and come back wearing something different that wasn't yours. You can't blame him for jumping to conclusions."

"But it's a misunderstanding," I whined childishly.

"I know," Sophie said sympathetically as she patted my arm. "I'm sure he'll understand once you tell him what really happened. Now wait for me while I go freshen up so we can go to breakfast together."

As we entered the cafeteria, I noticed some of the stares I was getting from the female population. I trudged on despite their expressions.

"Ignore them," Sophie whispered. "They're just jealous." After we grabbed our trays with our breakfast on it we chose to sit with the swim team. The girls greeted us with forced smiles. We were all silent for awhile until Lacey, the Captain spoke up.

"This silence is ridiculous," She complained as she turned to look at me. "Shirley, these girls want to know if you and Lelouch did the deed last night?" Is that what everyone seriously think happened?

"We didn't," I replied calmly without looking at her. Defending myself feels a bit tiresome. The other girls looked at me in disbelief.

"See? It's Shirley," Lacey replied with a bored tone. "Nothing happened, so let's move on with our lives, please." I sent her a grateful smile as she returned a wink at me. The tension lightened up as the girls conversed slightly unnaturally.

During noon, there was a student council meeting before going into the city for our free day. As I entered the recreation lobby, I spotted Milly and Nina sitting on one of the long tables. I called out a greeting to them as I approached.

"We're waiting for the guys now," Milly said to me as she neatly stacked papers. Nina suddenly stood up.

"I'll get us some snacks," Nina announced suddenly as she sent Milly a look. I caught this and I quizzically looked at Milly.

"Whats going on?"

"Hm? Nothing," Milly replied with a small smile. "Who'll accompany you during the free time in the city, Shirley?"

"Um, Sophie," I replied. "What about you?"

"I guess I can go with Lelouch, is that alright?" she asked with the same small smile.

"Why are you.." I started to ask, then I realized what she meant. "Milly, you know, nothing happened right?"

"I believe you," Milly replied as her usual bubbly smile returned. It suddenly hit me, it makes sense. Milly likes Lelouch. "What's the matter?"

"Huh? Oh, nothing," I replied as I gave her a weak smile. Nina returned along with Lelouch, Suzaku and Rivalz soon after. Milly was talking about the free time in the city, but I was lost in thought. How could I be so blind? Milly liked Lelouch all along...yet, she tried to put my feelings first. I feel like a bad friend. Moreover..why does it bother me? I should support Milly, shouldn't I?

"Meeting adjourned," Milly said as she slammed her hands on the table, making me jump out of my daze. I stood up and turned to walk to the door when Lelouch suddenly caught up and blocked my way.

"What do you want?" I was trying to hide my irritation that formed out of nowhere.

"Is that the treatment you give to someone that saved your life?" Lelouch asked as grinned.

"I'm not humoring you," I replied as the corners of my mouth gave way to a smile.

"Fine, fine," Lelouch said as he sighed. "Your clothes, it's in my room. Let's go." With that, he turned and led the way. I stood there for a moment as I felt an audience watching. I sighed and ran to catch up with him. We walked in silence for awhile.

"You didn't have to announce that now, you know," I told him finally as I walked beside him.

"But I did." Grrr...

"Anyway," I started to say. "I'll give you your shirt back when I'm done washing it."

"No need. Think of it as a birthday present."

"Thanks so much," I replied sarcastically. Lelouch stopped just right before his room door and faced me.

"In all seriousness. Your birthday is in July, next week, isn't it?" I nodded, with a surprised expression. I didn't expect him to know it.

"Yes, why?"

"I'll get you something for your birthday, if you get me something for mine," Lelouch replied cooly.

"Deal." Truthfully, his birthday is still months away isn't it? I heard him chuckle as his door swung open. I stood at his doorway feeling a little excited until he waved me in.

"Please sit," Lelouch instructed as he headed to the bathroom. I sat at the edge of one of the beds as I glanced around. Same room decor of course, but surprisingly the room looks too neat to be a guys room. On top of that, Rivalz his roommate. "Here," Lelouch handed me my top as he approached me.

"Ah, thanks."

"You're welcome." He walked to his balcony, naturally, I followed as if he was waiting for me. I stood beside him and gingerly leaned on the railings, enjoying the view. He had the view of the edge of the crystal blue lake and the outlines of the woods. We stood there in silence, enjoying the sights as the noises of birds and voices floated up could be heard. Being with Lelouch now..it's surprisingly comfortable and relaxing. As if our trial from last night somehow broke this communication barrier and I feel a little closer to him. Okay, stop. I can't think like this. I already knew there are some of Lelouch's fans that may hold a grudge on me right now. Besides, Milly likes Lelouch. I silently told myself that over and over until we both heard the door open. It was Rivalz calling us to go downstairs to get ready. I told them to go ahead as I ran to the direction of my room. As I entered, I noticed Sophie finishing up her hair in front of the mirror.

"You ready?" I asked as I made sure everything was in my purse.

"Mhm," Sophie replied holding her own purse up. "By the way, Shirley, I'll be with a couple other girls. I figured you'd be with Milly and Nina."

"Oh, that's fine," I replied, feeling a little disappointed as I thought of joining one of the girls on the swim team. As we exited, we caught Suzaku enter his room. Sophie, misreading the mood, bid me goodbye and ran off.

"Will you be with Sophie?" Suzaku asked as we watched her figure disappear around the corner.

"No," I shook my head. "I'm sure one of the girls on the swim team will accompany me."

"Well," Suzaku started to say as he looked down. "You can go with Rivalz and myself."

"Are you sure?" I asked slowly, looking at him. Suzaku's infectious smile appeared.

"Yeah, we'd be glad to have you."

Somehow, life for me kept giving me twists and turns one after another. Any girl in my position would consider theirselves lucky if they were in this situation just after a night with Lelouch. As we boarded the bus Rivalz broke the news.

"Um, guys," he called as we both approached him. "Sorry for the last minute changes, but..I'll be joining Lelouch and Milly." I silently debated in my head whether to curse or thank my lucky stars.

"Sure, good luck, buddy," Suzaku said easily as he thumped Rivalz on the back. As we were the last ones to board, the bus started up. We were nearing the last row, where we usually sit, but there wasn't any space. I followed Suzaku closely as he sat in an empty row. Too closely, for when the bus jolted, I lost my balance. I flung my arms out trying to catch something as I fell and I did. I landed on Suzaku. I was practically on his lap, as I quickly hopped off and scooted to the space next to his. I ignored the wolf calls and hoots as my face heated up.

"You okay?" Suzaku asked me. Without meeting his eyes, I nodded.

"Thanks to you." I could feel Suzaku's big green eyes on me. Without warning, his warm hand slipped under mine. I turned away to face the window, still unable to face him as he looked the other way. With his hand in mine, I silently thought to myself that this day might not be so bad after all.

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><p><strong>AN: Well, what do you guys think so far? Our heroine, just needs a bit more push for her to realize her full feelings, correct? Please anticipate next time for Shirley's and Suzaku's first 'date'! Thank you so much :) Leave a comment and let me know what you think will happen!**


	9. Chance

**A/N: Hello everyone! I'm back with a new chapter! This one is a bit longer than the usual. This is the chapter where wheel of fate starts to turn! Enjoy!**

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><p>Suzaku and I, it somehow it strangely feels natural. As if any strain in our friendship can't be dampen easily. How easily he makes my day bright without even trying. How my hand fits perfectly in his own. That's how it was, for the hour long ride to the city. We didn't really have a conversation with each other except for the occasional comment about the weather and whatnot, but there wasn't any awkwardness. For a split second, the thought of if this is how comfortable it would be to date him crossed my mind.<p>

When we finally arrived and unloaded off the bus, we milled around the sidewalk unsure of what to do.

"Man, this feels great!" Rivalz voice caught my attention as he, Lelouch and Milly got off the bus. My eyes landed on Lelouch. Our eyes met, and we naturally exchanged a smile.

"Have fun you two!" Milly called out as Suzaku laughed and waved. Suzaku and I both watched the three of them walk the opposite direction.

"I'm really craving something sweet right now," Suzaku stated as he turned to me.

"Ice cream is perfect for a sunny day like this," I agreed. Fortunately, we found an ice cream stand nearby.

"My treat," Suzaku said proudly as we lined up.

"Thanks," I beamed at him. I scanned the selections and decided on Vanilla while Suzaku chose Mint Chocolate Chip.

"What do you want to do?" I asked Suzaku as the ice cream melted its sweetness in my mouth.

"Anything you want," Suzaku replied. "We have plenty of time before it's time to go back."

"Let's finish the ice cream first then, Suzaku," I decided. We headed towards a plaza with a huge fountain at the center. We sat side by side on the edge as we both ate our ice cream. I noticed he kept on glancing at my cone, so I offered him a taste. He hesitated at first but tasted it nonetheless. I giggled at his expression as he held his cone out to me in return. As I tasted it, I immediately wished I've gotten this flavor. I wondered what we looked like to people right now. A young couple perhaps. Maybe having a boyfriend would be like this. If so, then that would be nice. When we finished, Suzaku and I looked over a map. We had so many places we wanted to go see and visit. There were two huge towers that you were able to travel in between by a cable car, and we decided we'd go on that last. It was the tallest pair of towers in the city, that you had a perfect view of it. I suggested shopping, and Suzaku gave in with a sigh knowing it was inevitable this would happen.

"Suzaku, what are you doing for summer break?" I asked as we were rifling through the stocks. We were inside a souvenir store full of ornaments and cute things. It was said to be popular with couples. Suzaku hesitantly came in.

"Working, I guess." Suzaku was standing by a stack of pink stuffed toys. He definitely looked out of place here. I let out a laughter as he realized why. He started laughing as well. "Okay, okay, that's enough."

"I'm sorry," I replied still laughing a bit. "That was a sight to see. But you didn't have to come in with me."

"It's alright. I'm looking for something anyways," Suzaku replied as he disappeared a few rows deeper. He returned with an item in hand, which I couldn't see.

"Hey, let's stop by the park after this," Suzaku told me and I nodded in agreement.

"You don't usually get any free time right?" I asked him.

"Not usually, I'm swamped with military duties and school," Suzaku closed his eyes and leaned back against the wall. "Trips and days like this are rare for me."

"Well, I'm glad you came then."

"Me too," Suzaku opened his eyes and turned to grin at me. "I haven't enjoyed myself in a long time."

Our next stop was the park. It was beautiful. The sun blazed brightly. Suzaku and I walked alongside the lake, watching people on small canoes. I yearned to go on one.

"You want to, don't you?" Suzaku queried beside me, reading my mind. I eagerly nodded at him as I raced ahead to the ticket vendors. When Suzaku and I finished putting our life jackets on, we both very carefully loaded on a small canoe. Suzaku pushed on the banks of the lake with his oars and off we slowly set. At first, we were rowing then we gave up and silently mutually decided to stop and just let the water lead us for now.

"The weather's great," I murmured to no one in particular, as I scanned my surroundings with awe. "Great day for something like this."

"It seems almost like it was planned," Suzaku agreed.

"Hopefully it'll be like this til the end."

"Lets not jinx it now," Suzaku said with a grin We spent the next several minutes just rowing again and commenting on the weather until Suzaku interrupted. "You don't have to tell me..but what did happen? You know..with Lelouch?" I fixed my gaze on the water; I've been expecting this for awhile now. I just didn't know when he would ask.

"We got stranded in a cave," I began, meeting his eyes now. "He lent me his shirt that he had from his backpack because I was soaking wet. That's all there is to it." I don't think I have to mention anything else.

"Why did he have a backpack?" Suzaku asked suddenly as if that's all that he paid attention to.

"You'd have to ask him." Suzaku nodded as he gazed afar, clearly deep in thought. "Well, I'm relieved to hear that's all then."

"Hm?"

"To be honest.." Suzaku trailed off, not meeting my eyes. I waited, not prodding him to continue. He took a deep breath and sighed. "I thought I knew Lelouch the best."

"Huh? Don't you?" I was confused now. They're best friends, childhood friends at that.

"But I think someone wants to take my place in that," Suzaku teased gently, as he now looked at me. As it dawned on me, I felt fluttering in the pit of my stomach.

"Don't be silly," I denied as I fanned my face. It was starting to feel a little warm all of a sudden. Suzaku chuckled softly.

"Shirley," Suzaku began speaking. I focused my attention at him. "I got something for you." He pulled out a small paper bag from his backpack and handed it to me. As I opened it, my face lit up. It was the item he bought from the store.

"Thank you so much." It was a pair of pink crystal roses hair clips and different colored hair ties. "I love it."

"Think of it as an early birthday present," Suzaku quietly said, clearly embarrassed from my reaction. "I heard from Lelouch. So when I saw it, I thought it'd look perfect on you..you know since you do your hair..I don't know, I'm not the best with getting girls presents." I could feel my eyes well up in tears. "Wait, I thought you said you liked it?"

"I do," I reasoned quickly. "I'm just very happy. Thanks, Suzaku." I smiled at him, feeling touched. He smiled back then after a few seconds his smile faded.

"Suzaku?"

"It's nothing," he began as gazed sadly at the water. "You sometimes remind me of her."

"Who?" Suzaku sighed and leaned back comfortably at his seat.

"Shirley, do you know who Nunally is?" He asked all of a sudden. Surprised, I hesitantly nodded. "Lelouch tell you who she was?"

"His sister right?"

"I guess I sort of can I understand why he told you," Suzaku chuckled.

"Well, I kind of asked him."

"Despite that, he still told you. He never talks about her," Suzaku's voice went quiet again. "I guess you three do share some qualities."

"I'm lost, Suzaku," I admitted. Three of us?

"You, Nunally and Euphie."

"Euphie?" I feel like I've heard that name from somewhere.

"My first love," Suzaku admitted a little hesitant as a transparent blush appeared.

"Ah," I didn't know how to react honestly. But I was curious. "What happened?" Suzaku closed his eyes for a moment then opened them.

"Years ago, us four, Lelouch, Nunally, Euphie and I would always be together," Suzaku said. There was a slight hint of sadness in his voice. But his eyes, which are usually expressive, remained passive. "I eventually fell in love with Euphie. It was just a childhood thing, but then this war..." He didn't say anymore in this matter, and I didn't want to press any further on it. But I can tell. How his feelings are still deep in there within him. He truly cared for this girl. "Sorry, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable." I waved it off.

"No," I replied gently as he turned to look at me. "I'm glad you trust me enough to reveal this to me." Suzaku laughed and the twinkle in his green eyes returned.

"There's nothing anymore," Suzaku continued casually. "Like I said there are times when you remind me of her." Suzaku paused for a moment. "When you smile, your kindness, the way you get excited or happy over the smallest things. Similar presence. A hidden stubbornness. Most of all, you two share the same optimism. You seem to always look forward. I guess I must of seen her again in you somehow." I smiled. I could only wager it being a good thing. "Lelouch must have seen it too." These two boys. Lelouch and Suzaku. I could see the sadness from the past in their eyes. They try to hide it, coping with it day by day. Even without Suzaku telling me. I knew somehow, him and Euphie not being together had something to do with this war he's fighting. Maybe that's the reason why he's fighting in the first place. I guess that's what drives him. Just maybe.

"Suzaku," I began a little hesitantly. "No matter what happens, you'll always have a friend in me. Whatever it is, I'll be here. Cheering for you." I said all this without thinking. I didn't need to, I just wanted to let him know. Suzaku fixed his big green eyes on me. I couldn't read his expression now. But I didn't regret my words, they were my true feelings.

"Thank you." He meant it. The canoe drifted off, without us speaking another word as the birds chirped in the backround. Our hearts finally connecting.

The sun was fianlly setting, there was only one more stop to go.

"The cable car?" I asked Suzaku as we headed to the direction of the towers. He nodded. The cable car headed to the other tower which wasn't too far from the bus meetup, so it's why this will be our last destination. As we used an elevator to the top of the tower, I was running a simulation of what might happen in there. When we arrived and lined up, we noticed most of the people in line were couples...well, except for a very familiar trio.

"Hey it's Suzaku!" That was Rivalz. "Shirley too!" I saw Lelouch's and Milly's surprised face.

"You guys are here too?" I heard Suzaku ask Rivalz.

"Yeah, this place is pretty famous," Rivalz answered. "I don't remember why though." Somehow the atmosphere seemed a little tense. Lelouch didn't greet us nor did Milly.

"Prez?" I whispered to Milly. She looked at me and smiled.

"Did you have fun?" She asked, as she forced herself to perk up. I nodded as Suzaku laid a hand on my shoulder.

"What about you guys?" Milly's smile suddenly faltered a bit. Lelouch glanced at his phone.

"We went to the arcade," Rivalz piped in, his voice full of energy. Hm? What's going on..? Milly then winked at me as she suddenly slung her arms over Rivalz and Suzaku. She whispered briefly in their ear as I suddenly had a bad feeling about this. Rivalz nodded enthusiastically, though Suzaku seemed surprised more than anything but didn't protest. Lelouch was still drawn to his phone, not knowing what was going on.

"Prez.." I started to say. We were almost at the front of the line. I met Milly's eyes as she gave me a genuine smile.

"Your chance," was what she said. It was our turn next. Lelouch walked in and sat down, waiting for us. The cable car was small. I would guess maybe only up to four people would be able to go. But no one moved. I didn't expect this. I wasn't at all ready for this. All of a sudden, Milly grabbed my arm and shoved me inside as I felt panic form within my chest. Rivalz winked at me. I sought Suzaku but all he did was shrug and gave me a smile. He's abandoning me too? After what happened?

"No point," Lelouch spoke up, defeatedly. "Might as well sit down." And sit I did, on command across from him. I locked eyes with Milly as the expression on her face was nothing but encouraging. As we drew farther away and could no longer see them, the awkward silence grew more apparent. I know Lelouch could feel it too. Lelouch sat comfortably looking forward not saying a word. I wondered how long this ride would be. I knew it would feel forever at this rate. Our knees were close enough to touch. My fingers gripped at the edge of the seat as my eyes looked anywhere but at him. "Did you have fun with Suzaku?" He asked suddenly. Did I hear a hint of jealousy? I must be hearing things.

"Yes," I replied without thinking. It was the truth.

"That's good," He replied back. But his tone indicated anything but that. "Nice, isn't it?"

"Huh?" Maybe I'm the only one actually nervous about this.

"The view." I turned my attention to the window and the night view of the city was really something. "The stars as well, though they aren't as impressive as the ones last night." I quickly looked at the night sky. He was right, there wasn't as many stars. They weren't as bright either. And most definitely would be hard to catch sight of shooting stars...it suddenly reminded me of my wish last night. The first wish that crossed my mind. I wished that I would have moments like that with Lelouch. It was a selfish wish, but simple. Yet, here we are again.

"Lelouch," I started to say as he casually turned to looked at me. His striking amethyst eyes, caught my breath. The full realization of my situation has suddenly settled down on me. I was alone once again with Lelouch. Milly gave me this..what did she call it? Chance? Suzaku too. "I wanted to go with you today." The words were out of my mouth quickly. And boldly. Lelouch blinked in surprise as I folded my hands tight together.

"That's correct," He nodded with a content look. "All of us should of just went together in the first place."

"That's not what I mean," I interjected, feeling a little annoyed he wasn't getting it. There wasn't anything stopping me now. "I just wanted it to be us two." Lelouch's eyes went wide and his mouth slowly opened. I did it now. I wanted to quickly take it back, but I stopped myself. Because, what if..

"Um," Lelouch suddenly looked away, his hair hiding his eyes. "Inform me earlier next time." A foolish smile was plastered on my face as I looked down. Warmth filled me up.

"Is that so?" I'm such an idiot, is that all I could reply with?

"Then, let's go next time," Lelouch said, his voice shaking a little. I shyly looked up at him, but he still wasn't looking my way. "Just us two." I could swear he was blushing. "Geeze, what are you making me say?" He finally turned to look at me as he had an embarrassed smile on his face.

"Sorry," I mumbled. Despite that, my foolish smile was still there. Our knees were touching now. It felt electrifying. Despite that, we didn't move.

"Beautiful," He muttered under his breath as he fixated his gaze at me. My face burned up quickly, as he chuckled at my expression. I lightly shoved him, teasing me like that..

"Gosh," I started to say as I looked away again. "We had a good mood going too! If only you-" I stopped as Lelouch's cold, slender fingers tucked a loose hair behind my ears. Just like last night. Our eyes met and he had this gentle smile on his face that relaxed me. It was the most gentlest expression I've ever seen Lelouch have.

"I'm serious," was all he said. His fingers lingering on my face. I felt a surge of confidence rise within me. With my heart racing, I decided to take advantage of it and confirm everything I've felt up to this point.

"Lelou.." I slowly leaned in, knowing I wanted this more than anything. I silently searched for permission on his face. He didn't pull away but instead gazed right back. His fingers under the side of my face, lightly pulling me towards him.

When the cable car suddenly came to a halt. All of the energy and confidence suddenly drained me as we both pulled away quickly. I covered my face as we exited. How could I do that? I couldn't bear to look at him right now. There was no way.

"Shirley," Lelouch spoke up besides me. I forced myself to sneak a sideways look at him; he was hiding his face again. "Call me Lelou from now on." He sounded embarrassed, that I giggled to myself. We walked to the bus like that, feeling the distance between us shorten. We were so close that we could touch. That's right. I wanted this more than anything. It's because I like Lelou.

I was ignorant of change. At this point of time, I never knew real suffering. I've lost my mother, it was a sadness that couldn't be expressed or ever be matched. If I knew at this time, how things would turn out. Maybe I would of done things differently to prevent the future from happening. Impossible thought. Maybe I wouldn't have this childish, naive optimism that Suzaku liked. One thing is for sure, forever is a long time. So much can change between now and forever. Even my friendship with Suzaku and Lelouch. Something hidden lurking in me, my feelings. That began a series of events that led up as to what happened.

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><p><strong>AN: How was that? Please look forward to the next chapter as Shirley faces life with a different perspective now that she knows her feelings. Please let me know what you think of this chapter:)**


	10. Jealous

**A/N: Sorry, it took awhile! Here's the next chapter! Enjoy!:)**

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><p>To like Lelouch. It feels as if my shoulders became lighter. As if a heavy load has been lifted. What replaced it was this fluttering in my stomach and the curiosity to know more about him. The want to be closer. And an even more selfish wish. This selfishness surprised me, but even then, I want to keep these to myself. At least for now. But when did it even all start? Does it even matter? I wonder..<p>

"So..." Sophie started to say as she watched me from the doorway of the bathroom. I ignored her as I washed my face. "You left with Suzaku but returned with Lelouch."

"Hm," I managed to reply as I continued to tend to myself.

"Shirley," her voice was filled with excitement now. "Tell me everything! From the beginning and don't leave out a single detail." I sighed, knowing she wouldn't leave me alone unless I tell her something mildly juicy. I walked past her and sat on top of my bed as she followed suit, her eyes shining. I sighed again.

"I had fun," I replied, as the day replayed in fast forward in my head. "It...was different."

"Details, girl, details!"

"Suzaku treated me to ice cream," I offered.

"What else?"

"He also bought me cute hair ties and clips as a present."

"...what else?" She repeated impatiently. I thought about telling Sophie about Lelouch, but decided not to. Not right now, anyways. I still wanted to sort out some things myself.

"We met up with Prez, Rivalz and Lelou, that's it." I averted my eyes. Expecting the mass questions that was soon to follow.

"Lelou..? You're back to that again? Something did happen!" Ooops...

"Um, well.."

"Hmph," Sophie grunted. She knew I was hiding something. "Okay." And that was that. She smiled at my surprised reaction. "I'll be expecting a full report someday." I promised her I would do just that.

The next morning, as Sophie and I entered the cafeteria, we immediately spotted Milly and Nina together.

"Morning," I greeted as we approached them.

"Good morning," Nina replied as she looked up from her breakfast.

"Ah, Shirley," Milly studied me for a second. "Had a good sleep?"

"Yes," I replied with a little hesitance. I still didn't have time to think over what she's done for me yesterday. I remained quiet as the girls had idle chatter. Milly was acting normal with me. Why did she give me the opportunity last night when she has feelings for Lelouch? A twinge of guilt stabbed me.

"You look like a mess, Lelouch," I heard Milly suddenly say teasingly. I didn't dare look up as my heart started to beat faster. Just by his presence is making me react like this.

"Good morning to you as well," Lelouch replied tiredly as he sat next to her.

"You have bed-head," Milly told him as she softly touched his hair. He grinned at her in reply as I felt my heart slightly hurt. They were always naturally close, but seeing them after learning of my feelings is making me react. I'm nowhere near her league.

"Hey, Shirley," Lelouch suddenly turned to me. I met his eyes, and I felt my stomach do a somersault. As easily as that, I melted.

"Morning," I managed to return to him.

"You two were mighty cozy last night on the ride home, eh?" Milly was definitely in her teasing mode. I could feel my face burn as the memory of it returned. I fell asleep on the bus ride and was leaning on Lelouch the whole time. Sophie and Nina giggled as Lelouch just gave me a 'let them' smile. The cafeteria suddenly erupted with gasps and rushed voices. The huge plasma TV was showing there was a breaking news. It was the aftermath of a terrorist attack last night. There were clips of Knightmares fighting.

"The Japanese are..." Nina managed in a small voice. I flinched.

"Nina.." Milly started to say, hestitating. There was a silence that couldn't be filled at that time.

"Wow, the internet is going nuts over that!" Rivalz suddenly appeared with Suzaku, his voice full of energy. He was scrolling through his phone. My focus was on Suzaku. He looked tired, as if he's been up all night.

"Are you feeling alright?" I asked Suzaku quietly as he sat next to me. Lelouch looked on intently at him.

"Huh? Oh yeah," He replied absently. "I've just been packing."

"Packing?"

"I have to return to Tokyo after breakfast."

"Duty calls?" I asked, trying to mask my worry as I studied his face.

"Duty calls," he replied, his trademark smile appearing, easing my worries away.

"I bet you're going to work out aren't you?" Lelouch spoke up.

"That's what you should be doing," Suzaku shot back.

"I don't need to, because I have this," Lelouch tapped his forehead, grinning wickedly. Listening to their friendly banter as everyone else discussed the terrorist attack in the background, I found it unsettling. Lelouch and Suzaku didn't even react nor partake in the conversation.

"You don't need to come say goodbye to me, you know," Suzaku chided me gently as I stood outside with him after breakfast. There was a van waiting for him.

"I know, it's just that.." I trailed off, feeling the emptiness return. Just yesterday, I was so happy spending time with him. And in just a single moment, all of that went away. Suzaku sighed.

"I'll see you soon," he finalized as he tugged a lock of my hair. Without hesitation, I closed the distance between us and wrapped my arms around his waist, basking in his warmth. Just as naturally, his arms went around my shoulders. In what seemed like forever in just seconds, he pulled away first, his warmth still lingering around me. His face, gentle and kind. Without another word, he stepped inside the van and he left.

As I stepped inside the grand lobby, I noticed a tall figure leaning against the wall.

"You should have gone outside to say goodbye." I told him as I walked closer.

"No need," Lelouch replied with his arms crossed.

"So what brings you here?" I casually asked as I leaned against the wall next to him.

"Wanted to see if you were okay," he replied indifferently. I turned to look at his face but he slightly turned away.

"Were you worried about me?" I teased him.

"Of course not," he denied. "Just wanted to see the effect Suzaku has on you, myself."

"Ah," I nodded slowly, feeling the need to tease him even more. "You're jealous then, right?" He faced me, denial full force on his face. "Just kidding!" I lightly shoved his arm as I giggled. Lelouch frowned at me for a second but a smile reappeared just as quickly.

"So," the tone in his voice suddenly became serious. "We go home in a couple hours."

"That's right..." Just thinking about it, is making me feel a little sad. In just a few days, so many things has happened.

"It was the right decision to go," Lelouch murmured.

"Hm?"

"Nothing," he shook his head. Being like this with Lelouch now..it's almost as if our relationship is different, and yet the same in a different sense. It was definitely hard to grasp. Unlike with Suzaku, I still don't know where I stand with Lelouch. "Ah, Milly."

"Shirley! There you are!" Milly was approaching us. "Hey, can you give us a minute, dear Lelouch?"

"Hm?"

"I need a girl talk with Shirley, so off you go!" Lelouch stared at her for a second then at me but then shrugged and left quickly, not sparing us a glance.

"Prez?" I knew what she wanted to talk about.

"Let's talk somewhere else, okay?" She grinned at me as she walked outside with me following suit.

We found a nice shade under a tree by the lake, where we sat next to each other in silence. I was desperate to fill it.

"Prez, I-"

"I confessed." With that single sentence, any preparations my mentality tried to prepare was quickly demoralized.

"To...Lelouch?"

"Of course!" She laughed. "Who else can it be?"

"Oh." I didn't know what to say. I wanted to ask so many things.

"It was this morning," She continued. "I banged on his door and told him at 6am in the morning, while I still had the courage. You should have seen the look on his face." She grinned at me. I folded my hands together tightly. That's why they seemed closer..."All I wanted was for him to be happy. But it's not something I'm capable of doing. In the end, nothing's changed."

"What do you mean, Prez?" Her expression suddenly turned gentle.

"After witnessing how he's been lately, I thought I had to act now. I acted on impulse," She told me, her voice going quiet. "In the end it was my own doing." I've never seen her like this. I reached over and laid my hand on top of hers. She looked at me, with a sad smile. It broke my heart, as the guilt within me grew stronger.

"I'm.." I started to say, still loss for words.

"Don't," She interrupted me swiftly. "If you say you're sorry now, it'll seem like I really lost." I nodded mutely as my fingers squeezed her hand. "Anyhow, seems like Lelouch doesn't have interest in love."

"That's right," I sighed in agreement. Milly placed her hands on my shoulders.

"That means, you have to work extra hard," She winked at me.

"Of course," There was no point in denying something she already knew about me.

"Otherwise, I'll make a comeback and take him right in front of you." I felt my eyes moisten. My strong, dependable Prez encouraged me. She was confiding in me.

"Thank you..."

Milly's feelings for Lelouch were strong and pure. She just wanted Lelouch to be happy. What about me? What can I do for Lelouch? I too, also wish for his happiness. I want to return the real smile on his face. All I can do for him now, is to watch over him. What comes after, is something I'll cross when it comes to.

We returned to Tokyo, and came the next festivities of the summer. With only a couple weeks left til summer break, preparations for the summer festival was out in full force. It was felt as classes resumed the very next day. With the terrorist attack in the back of everyone's mind, the school topic was about the what clubs would be doing what.

"We have a new student joining us today," My teacher announced in homeroom. That caught everyones attention. It's been months since school started, who could be joining us late in the school year? "Please come in and introduce yourself." A girl with short, fiery red hair and piercing blue eyes entered.

"My name is Kallen Stadtfeld, pleased to make your acquaintance," the girl said meekly as she bowed her head. She was definitely gorgeous, I could already hear a couple guys say that about her. I instinctively turned my attention to Lelouch who had his head bent and focused on a book in front of him. Suzaku didn't come to class today.

"Since Lelouch's seatmate isn't here, please occupy the seat next to him for today. Lelouch, raise your hand." Lelouch casually raised his hand as Kallen took a seat next to him quietly without another word.

After class, a group of girls surrounded Kallen asking questions about her. It turns out she's very sickly and mostly spent the first few months of school at the hospital so she was very well excused.

"I hear she's very smart," Rivalz said to me as he sat on top of my desk.

"I hope she'll be okay," I told him truthfully as I looked over her. She seemed very fragile.

We had a Student Council meeting after school, but due to my swim practice I was late. When I had arrived, the meeting had just ended. To my surprise, Kallen was present. She was already a part of the Student Council...Due to her being sick and out of school alot, she can't join any sports clubs and the other clubs had a strict attendance. Milly knew about this so she knew the best way for her to be in a club was be part of the Student Council. I thought it was a great idea.

"Shirley, let me get you caught up with what we discussed," Nina called me over. As she gave me a summary of what was discussed, I couldn't help but watch and listen in as Lelouch and Kallen bickered in the backround.

"And why can't you take notes for me tomorrow?" She asked him as her eyes narrowed. Kallen had a doctor's appointment and will be missing class.

"I won't be in class either," He replied coolly. "I have prior engagements."

"You mean gambling?" She replied her voice, sharp. "Rivalz told me all about it."

"Rivalz told you?" Lelouch asked, clearly surprised.

"Yes, unlike you, he's actually very helpful." She definitely gave off a different vibe from class.

"It's out of my control, like I said-"

"Umm," I interrupted, my voice coming out on its own. "I can lend you my notes, Kallen." She turned to me as I offered.

"Ah, thank you...Shirley right?" She asked as she gave me a small smile.

"Yes," I returned her smile. "I have better handwriting than Lelou anyways."

"I have decent handwriting, Shirley," Lelouch informed me. "You know that."

"I never said you didn't," I countered, my hands on my hips as I leaned towards him. "I just said mine was better, you know that." Lelouch grinned at me as I mocked him. I could feel Kallen watching us.

"You two seem close," She stated quietly, surprising me.

"..Rather," I changed the focus from me. "You two seem like you get along so quickly. Do you two know each other?" Kallen's eyes widened but quickly shook her head. Weird.

"No, there's no way i could ever know such a unmotivated guy," Kallen jerked her finger towards him. As Lelouch and her continued to bicker, the fact that they clearly got along so quickly, gave me a small knot in the pit of my stomach.

"Fine," Lelouch finally conceded in defeat. I watched him as his expression turned softer as he looked her. What's going on...? "I'll take notes for you next time." The smile she gave him in return, illuminated her beautiful face.

"You better," She responded, a slight blush coloring her cheeks. I stood there my feet numb, and for the first time in my life, I acknowledged the selfish part of truly liking someone. I accepted that I was jealous.

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><p><strong>AN: So Kallen has made her appearance. There's many more to reveal! Please stay tuned for the next chapter :)!**


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